Hidden
by ALittleBitofEverything101
Summary: Season 1 Episode 12. Takes place when Merlin is asking Gwen if she would kill the king if she had the choice. Merlin tells her that Morgana plans to kill the king. When Merlin goes to stop Morgana, Gwen follows him. She sees him use his magic. Merlin/Gwen. Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin.
1. Magic

**So, this is kind of my challenge to myself. I'm writing one fanfiction for each episode of Merlin. Some are one-shots, some are longer stories. I ran out of ideas for fanfictions so this is how I'm dealing with that. If anyone has any prompts for me, feel free to leave it in a review and if I write it after I finish writing these 65 stories, I'll dedicate it to you… so, thanks. And I give you Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Summary: Takes place when Merlin is asking Gwen if she would kill the king if she had the choice. Merlin tells her that Morgana plans to kill the king. When Merlin goes to stop Morgana, Gwen follows him. She sees him use his magic. Merlin/Gwen.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 1: Magic**

"You're right. Of course you're right," Merlin said. He could feel his mind spinning. Gwen was right. If Morgana aided in Uther's death, she would never forgive herself. It would make her as bad as Uther. Merlin had to stop her, but how? If he was seen anywhere near Tauren, Uther would assume he was conspiring with sorcerers. The irony.

But Merlin knew he had to stop Morgana. He would just have to be extra cautious. Merlin started to leave. He didn't have a lot of time. They would have already left. Tauren could try to kill the king at any moment.

"Is anything wrong?" Gwen asked concerned.

"No, no," Merlin said quickly. He didn't have time to tell Gwen and it would be dangerous for her to know.

"Merlin," Gwen said in a voice that showed she didn't believe him. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Merlin insisted. He glanced out the window in the hallway they were talking in. It would take him about an hour to get to Gorlois's grave. Hopefully Morgana and Uther wouldn't have traveled too quickly. Merlin should get there in time.

Gwen stood in between Merlin and the door at the end of the hallway. "I'm not blind Merlin," she told him sternly. "What is it?"

Merlin contemplated not telling her, but that would only delay his travels. He really needed to leave or it would be too late to save the king. "Morgana intends to kill the king," Merlin said reluctantly. "She asked Tauren for help."

"What?" Gwen said, her eyes widening with horror. As much as she despised Uther, she didn't want Morgana to kill him. "We've got to stop her."

"There's no we. If Uther sees you anywhere near them, he'll assume you're trying to avenge your father's death. Then he'll have you killed. You must stay here," Merlin told her. "I'll stop her. I promise. Everything will be okay. But you need to stay here."

Gwen looked at Merlin. She couldn't deny the truth in his words. "Be careful," she whispered. She kissed Merlin's cheek and then started to walk down the hallway to complete her duties before she could see his reaction. She hoped that he would be okay.

"I will," Merlin promised her. Gwen heard the door close behind him.

Gwen let out the breath she was holding. For several minutes she just stood looking out the window. It was beautiful outside, but she was struggling to see the beauty. Between her father dying and what she knew Morgana was attempting, there was little beauty in her world. She was afraid that Morgana would succeed. Morgana would never forgive herself and Gwen feared what that guilt would do to her friend.

Merlin took a deep breath when the door closed behind him. He knew that he could handle Tauren, but he hated to lie to Gwen. He knew in his heart that he was right to have lied. It was necessary. He pressed his hand to his cheek, it still felt warm from where she kissed him. Merlin only stood there a moment to compose himself before he rushed to the stables and began to prepare for his trip.

As Gwen was walking towards Morgana's chambers to fetch her dirty clothing, Merlin's words hit her. Tauren was a sorcerer. If Morgana had enlisted Tauren's help, there was nothing Merlin could do to stop him. He wouldn't stand a chance against Tauren. Gwen didn't necessarily believe sorcery was evil, but she did believe Tauren was not a good man. Morgana had been consumed by her anger and she lost sight of that. Tauren had left Gwen's father to get arrested. To Gwen, that was unforgivable.

Gwen borrowed a horse from the stables and followed the path she had once taken when she accompanied Morgana to her father's grave. When she was close, she dismounted the horse and looked around, trying to find Merlin. Gwen saw a body on the ground and ran to it. She was terrified that it might be Merlin.

It wasn't. It was a guard. Gwen could see the slash across the guard's stomach and how the blood had spread through his uniform and into the grass. There would be no saving him. Gwen let out a rough breath. She didn't know why she felt so emotional over the dead man before her. She hadn't even known him.

Gwen heard a rustle to her right. She tried to make herself as inconspicuous as possible as she walked through the tall grass. She heard the rustle again, this time it was closer. She saw two men. She recognized them. They had been with Tauren.

Fear curled in Gwen's stomach. She didn't dare move for fear they would hear her. They were much closer than she had anticipated.

Gwen heard someone mutter a strange word and something that can only be described as a bluish white bolt of energy shot out at one of the men. He collapsed to the ground and Gwen didn't see any sign of life in him. There was no rise and fall of his chest, no raspy breathing. She wasn't sure if she should be relieved or terrified.

Gwen looked around trying to find the other threat. After a moment, she saw Merlin holding a strange staff. There was a bluish stone at the top that seemed to be glowing. Gwen studied the staff. It look familiar, but she couldn't remember where she had seen it before. It took Gwen several moments to process that Merlin was the only person around other than the guard. He was the only one that could have cast that spell. Gwen didn't want to believe it. Fate had other plans.

"Acwele," Merlin shouted, pointing the staff towards the other man. Gwen watched as a bolt of energy shot out of the staff and killed him.

Gwen froze, unable to speak. She was barely able to process what she had just seen. Merlin had been the one to kill the men. Merlin was a sorcerer. He had magic.


	2. The Maidservant

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 2: The Maidservant**

Gwen stood there for a long time, thoughts swirling around her head until she saw Merlin move. Her eyes followed him as if the more she studied him, the more she would understand exactly what he was. Merlin was walking towards a tree where Gwen could vaguely make out a shadowy figure. Gwen hoped it was Tauren. If it wasn't him, it was no doubt some other sorcerer. Gwen wasn't sure how much more she could handle.

The man stepped out of the shadows and sure enough it was Tauren. Tauren noticed Merlin and took a step towards him confidently. "Acwele," Merlin said again. Before the energy could hit him, Tauren pulled out a stone and used it to collect the power from Merlin's spell. He sent it right back to Merlin.

Watching Merlin fall to the ground snapped Gwen out of her haze. She forced herself to stay rooted until Tauren had left. She could hear her heart pounding in her ears. That blast of energy had killed the other two men. She had to pray it wouldn't do the same for him. She cared about Merlin far too much to lose him. No matter what she tried, he stayed oblivious to her feelings. Whether that was because he was truly oblivious or he didn't reciprocate her feelings she didn't know. But she couldn't bear for him to die. "Merlin!" She called after Tauren was out of earshot. She ran to where Merlin was lying. He looked so pale. "Merlin!"

Merlin didn't move when she called his name. Gwen crouched down and brought her hand near his nose. She let out a sigh of relief when she felt spurts of warm air on her hand. He was still breathing. He was alive!

Gwen knew she should be frightened because Merlin was a sorcerer, but she wasn't. Perhaps it was because Morgana constantly complained about how she felt Uther's treatment of anyone who had magic was cruel, but Gwen didn't think Merlin would hurt her. He may have killed two men, but it was so he could save Uther and stop Morgana from doing something she may regret.

Gwen knelt by Merlin and shook him lightly. "Merlin," she called, hoping he would wake up. There was still no movement. Gwen closed her eyes trying to think about what Gaius had always done to awaken those who had been knocked out. Water! Cold water.

Gwen hoped some water would wake him up. She didn't know what else to try. She took her waterskin and poured it over Merlin. He sat up gasping. "What the hell was that?" He asked, looking around him. He remembered what Tauren had done. He brought his hand to his head. It was throbbing. He wasn't entirely surprised. He had just been hit by a burst of energy.

When Merlin noticed Gwen, he looked at her confused. "What are you doing here?" He asked her. Then he went pale. Had she followed him? How much had she seen? "How long have you been here?"

"Long enough, but we can talk about that later. You must save Uther from Tauren. Neither he nor Morgana have the power to combat him," Gwen told him. "And you do. You can save him."

Merlin nodded as he stumbled to his feet. He nearly fell, but Gwen steadied him.

"Are you alright?" Gwen asked him anxiously.

Merlin nodded. "I'm fine. Just a little dizzy," he told her.

Merlin heard the faint sounds of a scuffle. He ran towards the sound and he could hear Gwen behind him. When Merlin saw Tauren, he was wrestling with the king. Tauren held a dagger, but Uther was weaponless. There was a sword on the ground, but it was too far away from them. Uther would never be able to reach it.

Merlin watched as each fought for dominance. Without a weapon, he knew Uther wouldn't have a prayer of defeating Tauren. Merlin waited until it was inevitable that Tauren would kill the king. He had hoped that some miracle would help Uther so he wouldn't have to use magic, but it wasn't meant to be. Tauren was hovering over the king, his arm outstretched with a dagger.

"Acwele seo magdp," Merlin whispered. The last thing he needed was someone noticing him.

Just like that, Tauren died. He collapsed on Uther. Merlin turned to Gwen. "We need to get out of here," Merlin told her. If they were seen, Uther would have them killed. As it was, it was dangerous for them to be this close to them, particularly for Gwen. If Merlin was seen, Arthur might be able to spin some lie to spare him, but Gwen would be shown no mercy.

Uther pushed Tauren off of him and stared at the body. "He's dead," he said confused. "But he has no mortal wounds." Uther could not understand what had happened. One moment Tauren had been alive, the next dead.

There was only one possibility. Sorcery had been used. Perhaps Tauren had killed himself to spare himself a more painful death, but Uther didn't think that was the case. He hadn't heard Tauren say anything.

"I don't know how my lord," Morgana said frightened. She didn't know how Tauren could have just died. It was like magic, but Tauren was the only one here that had magic. Morgana was still frazzled by what had happened. She had been so eager for Uther's death and she hadn't realized until it was upon them how much she didn't want it.

Uther looked around, searching for anything suspicious, and saw two figures disappearing into the woods. He recognized the female. It was Morgana's maidservant. Uther cursed himself. He knew he should have had the girl restrained. She was dangerous. This wasn't the first time that Uther had suspected her of sorcery. Now he had proof.

"It is not safe here," Uther said quietly. He was worried the maidservant might come back and try to do more harm. Morgana was too precious to him for any ill will to befall her. "We must return."

Uther and Morgana were quiet as they returned to Camelot. Morgana was quiet as she contemplated Uther's earlier words. He had admitted he was wrong which was unprecedented for the king. She felt honored that she was one of the few capable of getting through to him.

Uther was quiet as he considered the maidservant. Part of being king was doing what was right even if it might hurt those closest to him. He knew Guinevere was there to avenge her father's death. She must have asked Tauren for help and then killed him when she knew he had no hope for success. It was just like a sorcerer to betray their own kind. There was no sense of loyalty in a sorcerer. Only evil.

Uther knew this would hurt Morgana, but he needed to do what was best for his kingdom. If he allowed a sorceress to reside at the heart of Camelot, her evil and corruption would spread like a disease until she has poisoned every decent man and woman in Camelot. Morgana's maidservant had magic and she couldn't be allowed to live.


	3. Sentenced

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 3: Sentenced**

The next morning, Gwen woke Morgana like she did every day. "How are you feeling today my lady?" Gwen asked her quietly.

"I'm quite alright. How are you Gwen?" Morgana asked her. She worried about her maidservant after everything that had happened with her father.

"I'm better," Gwen said honestly. She didn't know how long it would be before she felt like she wasn't choking on air, but she didn't want to burden Morgana with that. Besides, she had other things to think about. She and Merlin hadn't talked on their walk back to Camelot and she hadn't seen him since. Her mind was abuzz with all the questions she had for him. She wished she had taken advantage of their walk back to Camelot, but the silence had been filled with tension and she hadn't dared to break it.

"I too know what it is like to lose a father," Morgana said quietly. "I understand what you are going through. I know how you feel."

Gwen glanced up at Morgana as irrational anger filled her. "You don't know how I feel," Gwen snapped. "Our lives are completely different. You have no idea what it is like to have to work to support your father. Your father was often away, doing work for Uther, I saw my father every day. I sat down and dined with him morning and night. He would pick flowers in the morning just because he thought it would make me happy. You have no idea what it feels like to know your father was killed because he wanted to make a better life for you. You may know what it is like to lose a father, but don't pretend to know how I feel." Once Gwen finished her rant, she could feel color shading her cheeks. She couldn't believe she had just spoken to Morgana like that.

Morgana was staring at Gwen, her mouth opening and closing. She had no idea what to say to that. Gwen's claims were true, but Gwen had never snapped at her like that before. Not once.

"I'm sorry my lady," Gwen said curtsying. She wouldn't look up. She didn't want to see how much her words had hurt Morgana. "I best go and fetch your breakfast."

Gwen practically ran out of Morgana's chambers. She went to get Morgana's breakfast from the kitchen. She saw Merlin in the kitchen while she was waiting for the food.

"Gwen?" Merlin asked. He looked taken aback when he saw her. "What's wrong?"

"What makes you think something is the matter?" Gwen asked.

"I'm no expert, but generally when one is crying, it means something is wrong," Merlin pointed out.

Gwen brought her hand up to her eyes. Sure enough, she could feel the tears that were pooled in her eyes. "I'm sorry," she quickly apologized. She didn't know what was wrong with her lately.

"Don't apologize. I did a fair amount of that myself after Will died," Merlin told her quietly. "How are you feeling?"

"Awful," Gwen said sadly. She was ashamed at what she had said. "I just yelled at Morgana."

Merlin looked up surprised. Gwen and Morgan were good friends. They rarely fought. "Why?" He asked curiously.

"It was stupid," Gwen said. "She just said she knew how I felt and I snapped. No one knows how I feel and for some reason her saying that angered me. It's like she was trying to make me feel better by saying she has gone through something just as awful. With everything that has happened, I couldn't help it."

Gwen watched as Merlin picked up the tray containing Arthur's breakfast. "Perhaps you should tell her that," Merlin advised Gwen. "She may not know how you feel, but she does understand what you are going through. Your anger is only to be expected. It is part of grieving. She'll understand that. And maybe you'll find that it will help you to talk to her about your father and about how you are feeling."

Gwen sighed. "I hope you're right," she told him. She watched Merlin as he walked away. Gwen got her food then went back to Morgana's chambers.

Despite the fact that Gwen wanted to apologize, she couldn't make herself do it. She was so embarrassed by her behavior and didn't want to bring it up for fear that there would be repercussions for her outburst.

While Morgana ate, Gwen began to do her chores. Gwen was changing Morgana's sheets when the guards came. "Can I help you?" Gwen asked them confused.

"You're under arrest," one of the guards said as two others grabbed Gwen.

"This is absurd," Morgana said stepping forward. "Gwen has done nothing wrong. What are her charges?"

"She is being brought before the king for committing treason," the guard responded.

"Treason? But I haven't done anything?" Gwen said panicked. This was too similar to the last time she had been arrested. Someone had healed her father and they suspected her of sorcery. Somehow she didn't think there was going to be a miracle this time that would save her from the pyre. It seemed cruel to thrust this on her when she was still mourning her father. Why couldn't Uther just leave her be?

When Gwen was brought before Uther, she wasn't surprised to see that the doors were closed behind her. She knew Uther wouldn't want his ward here for this. Morgana wouldn't agree with whatever his sentence would be. He probably gave his guards orders not to let her enter.

Merlin stood behind Arthur, his eyes widening when he saw Gwen. He looked as if this was the last thing he had expected. She didn't blame him. This was the last thing she had expected as well.

"You have been brought before me on the charges of sorcery and conspiring to kill the king," Uther said in a cold voice. "Do you admit to your crimes?"

Gwen stared at him. "I'm not a sorceress, and I didn't try to kill you," Gwen said to him hysterically. How did she always get blamed for things like this? Why couldn't they just leave her be? Sometimes Gwen wondered if the Gods were out to get her. It seemed that as soon as she was almost recovered from something terrible, another terrible thing was thrust at her.

"I saw you when I was traveling with my ward. You conspired with a known enemy to the crown and sorcerer Tauren and you tried to have me killed," Uther said. "You were traveling with a companion. Who was he?" Gwen saw Merlin's face contort with horror. She didn't know if it was out of fear that she would turn him in or because she had gotten caught. Gwen hoped for the latter. She hoped that Merlin would have more faith in her.

"Like I would ever tell you that," Gwen spat bitterly. "You are a cruel man Uther Pendragon. You are so blinded by your hate that you refuse to see the good in people, you refuse to see that you are not always right. I was not there to conspire with sorcerers." Gwen bit her lip. That wasn't entirely true. She hadn't known it at the time, but she was indeed conspiring with a sorcerer. Just not for the reasons Uther believed. She had been conspiring with the sorcerer that saved his life. Gwen almost laughed at the thought. If only Uther could see what magic had done for him.

"You're words have shown that you are not repentant of your crimes," Uther said, his voice as angry as the expression on his face. "Tell me who your companion was."

"He is someone I care about dearly," Gwen said. She glanced at Merlin. He was looking right back at her, a faint smile on his lips. "I would never betray him to you. You are going to kill me regardless of my innocence. At least I can go to my death knowing I have spared a good man."

"So be it. You shall be executed at dawn. Guards!" Uther called. Two guards went on either side of Gwen. "Take her to the cells."

Gwen was faintly aware of the horrified look on Merlin's face before she was dragged out of the council chambers.


	4. Feelings

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 4: Feelings**

"Arthur please," Merlin begged for the thousandth time. "There must be something you can do for Gwen." If anyone could convince Uther of Gwen's innocence, it would be Arthur.

"You heard what my father said," Arthur told him frustrated. He was angry. He had promised Gwen that she would be safe and then she had to go do something stupid like be seen near a sorcerer.

"Do you believe him?" Merlin asked. He studied Arthur's reaction. He could see it clear as day. Arthur didn't agree, he was just afraid to go against his father's wishes.

"It doesn't matter what I believe," Arthur snapped. He honestly didn't believe that there was evil in Gwen's heart, but he couldn't argue with the evidence against her. Particularly when his father was the witness.

"You don't do you?" Merlin asked. "You don't agree with what he is doing. Yet you're going to stand by and watch him execute an innocent woman?"

"Enough," Arthur said furiously. Why couldn't Merlin see that there was nothing he could do? "I can't change my father's mind."

"Arthur, I can't let her die. I won't let her die," Merlin said desperately. "If ever you thought of me as a friend, please help me."

Arthur observed Merlin quietly. He had long since suspected Merlin of having feelings for Guinevere. He hadn't realized Merlin still had those feelings. "Why do you care so much?" He asked suspiciously.

"Gwen has just lost her father. Do you really want to see her suffer any more?" Merlin asked. "I know she is innocent of the crimes that she has been accused of. Gwen is not a vindictive person. She would never try to hurt Uther."

"You care for her," Arthur commented. It was written on Merlin's face, inscribed in his features.

"She's my friend," Merlin explained. Arthur had to resist his eye roll.

"It's more than that," Arthur said. "I've seen you like this once before. The last time Guinevere was arrested. Do you still have feelings for her?"

Merlin groaned. Why did Arthur instantly jump to that conclusion? He didn't care for Gwen that way. She was just his friend. Why couldn't they just be friends? "Why do you insist I have feelings for her?" Merlin asked frustratedly.

"Because of how you are acting," Arthur told him. "Do you really not realize it?"

"Realize what?" Merlin asked confused.

"That you act like a lovesick puppy whenever Gwen is in danger," Arthur told him.

"I do not," Merlin protested. He didn't think he acted strangely. He would act this way if Arthur or Morgana were in danger.

"So you meant to tell me that the fact that you threatened to break Gwen out of prison doesn't indicate you have feelings for her?" Arthur asked amused.

"I didn't threaten to break her out of prison," Merlin said surprised. He had been thinking it, had actually been plotting how to do it and how to keep her safe, but he most definitely hadn't said it out loud.

"Not in so many words," Arthur agreed. "But you said you won't let her die."

Merlin sighed. "She's just my friend," he claimed.

"Who are you trying to convince?" Arthur asked. "Me or yourself?" He used his I'm right and you're wrong voice.

Merlin groaned. "Why can't she just be my friend? Why does she have to be more?" He asked Arthur angrily. "Even if I did have feelings for her, which I don't, it would never work. We both have jobs here. I don't have time for anything like that between helping Gaius and serving you. And if you don't help me, she'll be dead by morning."

"Is that why you haven't told her?" Arthur asked him curiously. Normally he wouldn't prod Merlin like this, but it was amusing to see Merlin blush and look so uncomfortable.

Merlin sighed. Why wouldn't Arthur just accept he didn't have feelings for her? She was just his friend. It was natural that he would care for her after the kindness she had shown him. It was natural he would replay the kiss she had given him after Gaius had given him an antidote to the poison he had drunk. It didn't mean anything.

"Or is it because you are afraid that you might actually lose her?" Arthur asked him.

"I am afraid to lose her," Merlin admitted. "But it's because she is my friend. Gwen's like you, she's just not as much of an ass."

"I am extremely flattered and only slightly uncomfortable by that. I'll excuse it because you are still trying to convince me you don't have feelings for Gwen, but let me ask you. How would you feel if you lost Gwen? Really think about it," Arthur prodded. He didn't know why he cared so much that Merlin admits it. Maybe it was because he knew if their situations were reversed, Merlin would do the same for him. Or maybe it was because Arthur needed a really good excuse to do something incredibly reckless. As a prince, Arthur is held to a different set of standards. He swore to uphold the laws of Camelot. He wasn't about to break those vows if he didn't need to.

Merlin decided to humor Arthur and he thought about it. The moment he did, he understood what Arthur had been saying. Because Merlin simply couldn't picture that future, mostly because he didn't want to. He couldn't even consider that future, because it was far too painful to think about a future without Gwen. A future free from her smile and her laughter. It wasn't a future worth living.

Arthur could see the truth written on Merlin's face. "Arthur, please help me," Merlin pleaded.

"Will you admit you have feelings for Gwen?" Arthur asked.

Merlin nodded. "I… I do," he whispered. "I truly didn't realize… well I guess I did, I just didn't want to admit it. Please, I can't lose her."

Arthur nodded. "I'll help you," he promised. He needed a good excuse to break the law and Merlin had just given it to him. Merlin was his friend and he would be completely unbearable if he was moping over losing the woman he loved. For the good of Camelot, Arthur had to help him.


	5. The Breakout

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 5: The Break-Out**

Gwen had difficulty falling asleep that night. Perhaps it was because she knew she had an eternity to sleep, but her body refused to sleep. The minutes crept by at an agonizingly slow pace. Eventually, Gwen drifted off into a restless sleep. It seemed she had just closed her eyes when suddenly she was awoken.

Gwen was woken up by a loud clatter. She ran to her cell door, trying to see what was happening. She could see shadows on the wall, nothing else. And then suddenly Merlin was in front of her. "Merlin?" Gwen asked surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"Breaking you out," Merlin said. He looked over his shoulder anxiously. "Arthur's distracting the guards, so we must hurry." Merlin unlocked her door with the key Arthur had given him.

"Why are you doing this?" Gwen asked him confused. "Why is Arthur?"

"He's doing this for me," Merlin explained, intentionally dodging her first question. Now was not the time, nor the place to have that discussion. "Now we really must go."

Gwen nodded and followed Merlin down a set of stairs in the very back of the prison. It led them to a room with several shields on the wall. "Arthur will be here shortly," Merlin whispered quietly.

"You never told me why you are doing this," Gwen told him quietly. She was studying Merlin intensely, trying to figure out why Merlin would break the laws for her and why Arthur would help him.

Merlin hesitated. He could hear footsteps coming towards this room. He was sure it was Arthur. He hadn't entrusted Merlin with the key and he needed to put the shield back up so they wouldn't be pursued in this direction when the knights noticed Gwen was gone.

"Merlin, I need to know," Gwen said desperately. "I need to know why you are risking so much for me."

Merlin opened his mouth to tell her, but he was cut off by Arthur. "You must hurry. The guards aren't suspicious yet, but they will discover you are gone soon enough. Make haste. And Merlin, be careful when you return. I don't want to have to break you out of prison as well," Arthur said as he entered. He tried to sound nonchalant, but it was obvious he worried about the danger his manservant was putting himself in.

Gwen curtsied to Arthur. "Thank you Sire," she said. "I really appreciate you doing this."

"I didn't do this for you," Arthur said quietly. He still wasn't sure what to make of Gwen. Merlin insisted she hadn't been trying to kill his father, but why was she there? Why was she so close to the grave site? "I did it for Merlin." Arthur took the shield off the wall and opened the hidden door. "Good luck."

Gwen climbed through first.

"Thank you Arthur," Merlin said quietly. "I'll see you in the morning." Merlin climbed into the tunnel.

"Be careful," Arthur warned before he closed the door behind them. Arthur mounted the shield and sighed. He really hoped they'd make it.

Merlin and Gwen crawled through the narrow tunnel. When they got to the end, they found it was covered by a locked grate. "Did Arthur give you the key?" Gwen asked uncertainly.

"No," Merlin said with a sigh. "He must have forgotten that bit. Hold on." The tunnel was narrow and Merlin needed to squeeze past Gwen to see what the grate looked like. There were different spells depending on the type of lock and he needed to know which to use. Having to move forward meant he and Gwen were very close to one another. He was practically on top of her.

To his relief, it was a simple lock. "Aliese," Merlin whispered. The lock clicked and the grate swung open.

"You're eyes. They changed color," Gwen said startled.

Merlin nodded. "My mother told me they do that," Merlin told her.

"How long have you known magic?" Gwen asked him curiously as they climbed out of the tunnel. The tunnel let out outside the citadel into an area on the outskirts of the woods, which is why Arthur had suggested they use it to escape. If his mother told him that, it had to have been before he came to Camelot. They really wouldn't have had much time to discuss magic with everything that had happened the last time he was in Ealdor.

"I was born with it," Merlin told her quietly as they walked through the forest. Merlin didn't know where they were going exactly, but he needed to get her somewhere safe. "It's not something I ever learned. Well, I guess I learned some of it when I came to Camelot and Gaius gave me a book of spells, but until then, I just did it."

"What do you mean you just did it?" Gwen asked perplexed.

"I don't have to say anything to use magic. I've been able to levitate objects with my mind, stop terrible things from happening, and help people in need. All with my mind," Merlin explained. He was slightly distracted as he kept searching for a safe place for Gwen to stay the night.

"But… how?" Gwen asked surprised.

Merlin shrugged. "I think it and it happens. All my life, I've tried to figure out why I have my powers. When I came here, I met someone who told me that I have my powers so I can save Arthur. He is my destiny. He is meant to be a great king one day and I'm supposed to help him do that," Merlin said. He shook his head. When he had first found out he had been skeptical and rightfully outraged. Now he believed it.

"How do you do that?" Gwen questioned. She couldn't help but ask. This was the first chance she had had to ask him about his magic and she wanted to know everything.

"Little things. When he is in danger, I use my magic to help him. Do you know how many times I have saved his life? I've lost count," Merlin muttered.

"Have… have you ever used magic for me?" Gwen asked him quietly.

Merlin froze. "If I answer that, are you going to be scared?" Merlin asked her anxiously.

"No," Gwen answered honestly. "Morgana has often talked about people with magic and how they aren't as evil as Uther makes them seem. She has always been sympathetic and I can't say I disagree with her. I see both sides. There is evil in sorcery, but there is also good. I have seen you kill, but only to save Uther. If that doesn't prove you are good, I don't know what would."

Merlin turned around and hugged Gwen. He couldn't help himself. "Oh thank you," he said to her, a huge smile on his face. He didn't know what he would have done if Gwen had turned her back on him. It would have ripped him apart.

Gwen blushed when he released her. She was grateful for the darkness that hid her features. "You didn't answer my question," Gwen pointed out.

"I have," Merlin said after a long moment passed. "It was only once, when your father got sick. You were so upset and I couldn't bear to see you in pain. I used magic to heal your father." Merlin paused. He could hear Gwen crying. "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Gwen said, her voice wavering. "It was not you that caused Uther to have my father killed."

They walked for several minutes before they came to a stop in a small clearing. "You should be safe here," Merlin told her. "Forbearnan firgenholt." Merlin watched as the trees around spread around the clearing, hiding it from view. Someone would have to know exactly where the clearing was to find it.

Merlin took off the bag he had been carrying on his back. He handed Gwen a blanket. The trees would protect her from the wind, but it still got chilly at night. Merlin made a small campfire in the middle of the clearing. It would also help keep her warm. "I'll come back tomorrow night and I'll help you find a place to live. There are many cabins in these woods," he told her quietly. "I'm sorry that this is happening to you Gwen."

"Why are you doing this? Why are you being so nice to me?" Gwen asked him. Merlin studied her in the flickering of the fire. Her eyes were still a little red.

Merlin wasn't conscious of moving, but he had moved his head closer to Gwen's so their lips were almost touching. "I'm doing this because I care about you far too much to lose you," Merlin told her honestly. He looked for the answer in her eyes, looked for whether or not she was okay with this. He saw her eyes flicker to his lips and back up to his eyes.

He took that as an affirmative and gently brushed his lips against hers. It was an explosion of feeling. The kiss was far from perfect, but that's what made it so amazing. Gwen leaned up into the kiss trying to make it last as long as possible. Merlin brought his hand up to cup her cheek.

When they broke apart, Merlin couldn't help the goofy smile that had spread across his face.

"Does that answer your question?" Merlin asked her breathlessly. Gwen nodded and leaned up to steal one last kiss from him.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Gwen said with a small smile.


	6. Reunion

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 6: Reunion**

The next morning found Merlin exhausted, but happy. Merlin brought Arthur his breakfast, humming under his breath.

"I take it everything went well with Guinevere?" Arthur asked amused as he watched Merlin. Merlin had just spun in a circle while dusting.

Merlin nodded. "Very well," he admitted, unable to keep the smile off his face. He never knew a woman could have this effect on him. "I'll be seeing her again tonight. How'd it go here?"

Arthur raised his eyebrows. He was very surprised to hear Merlin would be sneaking out again to visit her. It really must have gone very well. "It went well. The fake trail was planted. Some of my knights believe they caught her trail on the way to Essetir. They believe she is seeking sanctuary there. My father has called off the search. He has ordered the guards to notify him if she is ever seen in Camelot," Arthur explained lightly. It was rather disconcerting how easy it was to fool his knights. He was able to justify it by telling himself it was good practice for them.

Merlin smiled. Essetir was the opposite direction of where Gwen was hiding. "Thank you sire. You have no idea what she means to me," he told Arthur honestly.

"Perhaps not. But I hope to one day," Arthur said quietly. He couldn't help but notice the substantial difference in Merlin. He would be a lucky man if he found someone he loved as much as Merlin loved Gwen. "I think it might be wise if you let Morgana know about Gwen. She was distraught when she heard that Gwen had left. I think it would bring her some relief to know Gwen is safe. I didn't tell her, because I felt you would want to, but I really didn't appreciate being told I'm just like my father and that Camelot will be doomed one day. Oh and what was the other thing? Something about how I'm an arrogant prat and I'm lucky that I know how to breathe without my father's say so."

Merlin nodded, but couldn't stop his chuckle. He could imagine how angry Morgana would have gotten at Arthur. "I'll be sure to do that," he promised. Morgana had a right to know, Gwen was her best friend. And he knew Gwen would love to see her as well. Merlin hesitated. Gwen would love to see her, but not yet. He would help Gwen find a real place to live and would help her get settled and then, when she was ready, he would tell Morgana. "One day, when you are king, do you think you would ever let Gwen back into Camelot?"

"I'm not sure," Arthur answered honestly. "There is a long time before I will be king. Right now, my answer would be no. I helped her escape for you and only for you. She was at Gorlois's grave site for a reason. I don't know why. I don't know if it was to kill my father or if it was for some other reason, but she was still there. I cannot ignore that. But maybe one day my answer will change."

Merlin nodded. It was about what he had expected from Arthur and he appreciated Arthur's honesty. "Can I ask you something?" Arthur asked him uncertainly.

Merlin looked at him amused. "You're the prince. You can ask me anything," Merlin pointed out.

"But will you answer me honestly?" Arthur asked, never breaking eye contact with Merlin. Merlin's humor immediately vanished. Arthur was being completely serious with him right now.

"I will," Merlin promised.

"If you care about Gwen so much, why don't you leave Camelot and stay with her?" Arthur asked him. It was something he had been puzzling over since Merlin left with Gwen last night. Merlin had nothing to keep him here, so why did he stay?

"Who would protect your royal backside?" Merlin asked with a straight face.

"Merlin," Arthur said with a sigh. Here he was, trying to have a serious conversation and Merlin has to make a joke about his incompetence. Typical. "I'm serious."

"So am I," Merlin told him. "You wouldn't last a day without me. Who would bring you breakfast? Who would clean up after you? Who would tell you when you are being a clot pole? No, you need me far too much for me to leave."

Arthur stared, uncertain that he had heard Merlin correctly. "You're staying in Camelot for me?" He asked confused.

"You're my friend Arthur, I'm not going to leave you," Merlin told him seriously. Merlin hated that he couldn't stay with Gwen. He wished he could spend his every waking moment with her. But he knew that if he stayed with Gwen, something unmentionably horrible would happen to Arthur and Merlin would never be able to forgive himself. He could no more distance himself from Arthur than he could distance himself for Gwen. Arthur was his destiny, and Merlin knew Gwen understood that. Merlin hated that he had to divide his time; he would never have enough for either of them, but it was the best he could do.

Arthur nodded. He didn't know what to say to that. He had never met a man like Merlin before. He never thought he would meet a peasant that would become this good of a friend to him.

Merlin waited several weeks before he told Morgana about Gwen. He was sure she would want to see Gwen and he wanted Gwen to get settled first.

Merlin and Gwen had found a little cottage in the woods. It was a little run-down, but it was long since abandoned and with a little help from magic and a bit of hard work, it was as good as new. Then came the hard part. They had to make it livable for Gwen. Most of the furniture in the cottage was broken, so they had decided to discard all of it. They cut the wooden furniture into pieces that Gwen would be able to use for the fire. Bit by bit, Merlin shrunk furniture so he could sneak it out of Camelot and brought it to Gwen. It would be suspicious if he took a lot of furniture from the castle all at once. It took three weeks, but Gwen's new home was eventually fully furnished. Merlin visited Gwen every night. Most of the time, he stayed all night, sleeping on the little cot that he had brought with him the first time he planned on staying the night. They had realized quickly that Merlin's fatigue made it difficult for him to complete his duties as Arthur's manservant if he was out until all hours of the night and then had to go back to Camelot to sleep. It still wasn't enough though. He wished he could have more time with her, but that wasn't possible. Gwen understood his responsibility to Arthur. Neither of them liked it, but they knew it was necessary.

When Merlin told Morgana, it was as he suspected. She insisted on seeing Gwen. She literally would not take no for an answer. That night both Merlin and Morgana snuck into the woods towards the cabin that Gwen lived in. As they walked, Merlin explained to Morgana that he wanted to surprise Gwen.

Merlin still felt guilty about causing Gwen to have to leave Camelot. He hoped that this would cheer her up. Morgana waited behind a tree while Merlin greeted Gwen.

Merlin hadn't told Morgana about his relationship with Gwen and he could practically feel her eyes boring into him after he kissed her. Morgana was still hiding behind a tree, but he knew she could see them.

Merlin internally groaned. He knew Morgana was going to badger him about it their entire walk back now. He was never going to hear the end of it.

"I brought you a gift," Merlin told Gwen after they had broken apart.

Gwen looked at Merlin slightly startled. "You didn't have to do that," she told him surprised.

"Oh I did," Merlin said with a small smile. If he hadn't Arthur would have killed him. Arthur was tired of Morgana blaming him for ruining Gwen's life because he refused to go against his father. And Merlin had to admit that Morgana was persistent with her insults. "Come out," Merlin called.

Gwen looked more confused than before. She looked around nervously. When she saw Morgana, her jaw dropped. "My lady," Gwen said shocked.

"Hello Gwen," Morgana said, a smile spreading across her face.


	7. Missing

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 7: Missing**

For a moment the two women stared at one another as if they weren't sure they really were there. Gwen made the first move. She took a step towards Morgana and suddenly the girls were crying and hugging. Merlin stared. He couldn't make out a thing they were saying, but he thought he caught an apology here and there. He definitely heard something about hair. He sighed and leaned against the cabin. He made himself comfortable for he didn't know how long they would talk for. He would never understand women.

Merlin was grateful when Gwen and Morgana decided to go inside and sit down. Merlin sat on Gwen's bed, studying the book of spells he had long since left there.

He submerged himself into the world of the old religion. He didn't know how long had passed before he became aware that they were talking about him.

"Is it safe for me to ask you about Merlin?" Morgana asked Gwen quietly. She glanced over at Merlin. He seemed to be entrapped in his book, but looks can be deceiving.

"Yes," Gwen said amused. "This cabin could catch on fire and Merlin wouldn't notice. He doesn't pay attention to anything when he reads that book."

Morgana chuckled. "Somehow that doesn't surprise me. So how are things with Merlin? Is he good to you? Because if he's not I can get Arthur to have him arrested and thrown in prison for a couple of days," Morgana offered.

Merlin had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. He could hear Gwen's laughter. He turned the page in his book so they wouldn't realize he was eavesdropping.

"That won't be necessary," Gwen told Morgana. "Things are going really well. I just wish I got to see him more. He's here every night, but we're only awake for an hour or two. He's always gone before I wake. It's not enough."

"That must be frustrating," Morgana commented. "Why don't you ask him to leave Camelot? He could come live with you. You could be happy."

"I am happy," Gwen told her. "Besides, he has a responsibility to Arthur. He can't just leave him. I understand that." Gwen sighed. It wasn't the perfect arrangement, but the perfect arrangement simply didn't exist. Gwen understood Merlin's duty to Arthur.

"You really like him, don't you," Morgana observed. If a man told her that he wasn't going to stay with her because he had to skivvy after some prince, Morgana would have some choice words to say to that man - and they would not be good choice words. She definitely would not be taking it as well as Gwen.

"I do," Gwen told her. "And he really loves me."

"I'm glad to hear it," Morgana told her sincerely.

After that, they were back to talking about strange girl stuff so Merlin began to truly read his book again.

Hours later, when Gwen was practically falling asleep, they said their goodbyes. Merlin rarely stayed awake that late and he knew he was going to be miserable the next day. Gwen kissed Merlin gently. "Thank you," she whispered. "Thank you so much."

Merlin kissed her forehead. "I know it's not much, but it's something," he told her.

"It's perfect," Gwen corrected. She glanced at Morgana who was standing by the door, giving them a little bit of privacy. "I love you."

"I love you too," Merlin told her. He kissed her one last time. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Merlin reluctantly left Gwen. He joined Morgana and could see from the look on her face that it was going to be a long walk back to Camelot.

Sure enough, the second the cabin was out of view, the questions started. Merlin groaned, but answered all of her questions honestly. Morgana was legitimately happy to see them together and to know Gwen was doing well.

After that, Morgana visited Gwen at least once a month. She felt partially responsible for Gwen having to leave, because Merlin and Gwen had explained that they had followed her and Uther to stop her from doing something she would regret.

It was about three years after Gwen had escaped Camelot. Merlin and Morgana had just visited her. Merlin had only missed a handful of nights with Gwen in those three years. And he had always told her he wouldn't be there beforehand. There was one time where Merlin found out that day and sent Morgana into the woods during the day time to tell her that he wouldn't be there that night. That's why when Merlin didn't show up the following night, Gwen worried. She forced herself to calm down. If there was something happening with Arthur, it was natural that Merlin might not be able to make it out to see her.

But after two more nights without Merlin, Gwen was sure something was wrong. Gwen didn't care if it was reckless. She put on the pale purple cloak Merlin had brought her for when it got cold and she walked towards Camelot.

She knew this was risky. If the knights recognized her, she would be killed on the spot, but she needed to make sure Merlin was okay.

Gwen went in the back gates of Camelot. To her relief, the guards didn't question her. She realized that was quite dangerous on their part. She could be anyone just walking into Camelot in the middle of the night.

Gwen followed the familiar path to Gaius's chambers. Merlin's chambers were beyond Gaius's workshop. Gwen snuck in, being careful not to alert Gaius to her presence. When Gwen got to Merlin's chambers, she found that his bed was empty. A blood-chilling fear began to gnaw at Gwen. instinct told her something wasn't right.

Gwen went straight to Arthur's chambers. She was relieved that he didn't have guards stationed outside of his bedroom.

Gwen entered without knocking. It was so dark, she couldn't see anything. "Arthur?" Gwen whispered. "Arthur."

Gwen could make out the sounds of shuffling feet then the curtains were thrown open lighting Arthur's chambers with moonlight. Arthur looked towards Gwen, his face contorting with surprise. "Guinevere?" He asked uncertainly. Arthur thought she would have been with Merlin.

"Arthur, I'm really worried about Merlin. I haven't seen him in three days," Gwen told him anxiously.

Arthur was suddenly wide awake. "He hasn't been here. He had mentioned a long time ago that he wanted to take you to Ealdor to visit his mother. I figured he had done that. Wouldn't be the first time he neglected to tell me something important," Arthur said worriedly. Gwen thought she detected a hint of bitterness in his tone as well. "When was the last time he visited you?"

"When he and Morgana visited me three nights ago," Gwen told him honestly.

"I'll ask Morgana if Merlin said anything," Arthur told her. Arthur put on a cloak. It was the middle of winter and while his chambers were warm, the rest of the palace wouldn't be.

"It's the middle of the night," Gwen protested.

Arthur paused. "So it's okay to wake me at all hours of the night, but not Morgana?" He asked slightly amused.

Gwen looked at him apologetically. "I figured if anyone knew where Merlin was, it would be you," Gwen explained.

"Morgana is all we have to go on. She may have been the last person to see him," Arthur told her quietly. "Ill not wait until morning. Merlin has been missing for three days. If we want to find him, we have to start now." Arthur didn't say what he was really thinking. That if Merlin had been taken three days ago, it was unlikely he was still alive.

Arthur and Gwen went to Morgana's chambers. They hoped she would have the answers they needed.


	8. Secrets

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 8: Secrets**

When they entered Morgana's chambers, she was tossing and turning. "I should wake her," Gwen told Arthur quietly. It would frighten her more if Arthur woke her. Besides, Gwen had been Morgana's maidservant for years. It was her responsibility to wake Morgana.

Gwen walked towards Morgana and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "My lady," she said shaking her gently.

Morgana's eyes shot open and Gwen could have sworn she saw a flash of gold in them. The same flash of gold she often saw in Merlin. Gwen shook her head. It must have been a trick of the light.

"Gwen?" Morgana asked shocked as she sat up. She looked around and let out a sigh of relief when Arthur was the only other person she spotted in her chambers. It was incredibly dangerous for Gwen to be here. "What are you doing here?"

"Looking for Merlin. Have you seen him?" Gwen asked uncertainly.

Morgana shook her head. "Not since he was preparing to visit you three nights ago," Morgana explained confused. "I thought he would have been with you since he never came back."

"Are you sure he didn't come back?" Gwen asked. Morgana nodded.

"How can you be sure?" Arthur asked frustratedly.

Morgana bit her lip. "Merlin has been helping me with something. It was something only he could teach me. He has been meeting me in the library every morning and night for a couple of months now," Morgana admitted.

Gwen closed her eyes. If she wasn't absolutely certain that Merlin was faithful to her, she would kill him for not telling her about that. But she knew if Morgana wasn't willing to speak of it and if Merlin hadn't told her, it must be important that it is kept secret.

Arthur looked at Morgana with a look of disbelief on his face. He quickly pushed that aside. "You said he visited you as he was preparing to see Gwen. Did he say anything out of the ordinary or do anything strange?" Arthur asked.

"He seemed a little jumpy, but he always does when he is helping me with my studies," Morgana explained. Then her eyes widened. "There was one thing. He begged me to make sure you would be okay if anything happened to him," Morgana explained. Morgana hesitated. She studied Gwen for a moment, before she made up her mind. She knew she could trust her. Merlin had trusted her with his secret, Morgana would do the same. Her voice dropped so low, she wasn't sure Gwen would be able to hear her. "I have a similar set of skills that Merlin has. That's why he has been teaching me. I begged him not to tell you. He only found out by accident and I didn't want to bring anyone else into it." Gwen's eyes snapped up to Morgana's, filling with understanding. She understood why Merlin hadn't told her. She didn't forgive him yet, he shouldn't keep secrets like this from her, but she understood.

"Feel free to explain what is going on," Arthur said frustratedly.

"It's a long story," Morgana told him. "One you are not ready to hear."

"Merlin told me long ago that he often would confide in Gaius to figure out how to sa–" Gwen cut herself off and glanced at Arthur. She had been about to say how to save Arthur, but she couldn't really say that in front of the prince. "How to find a particular solution to a certain problem. Perhaps Gaius will know where Merlin is."

"Do you think it wise to wake an old man in the middle of the night?" Arthur asked.

"He's our only chance," Gwen said in a rush. She didn't know why, but she was suddenly overwhelmed with feelings of impending doom. She had a feeling that if they didn't act now, something terrible was going to happen. Something so terrible, she couldn't think it with words, she could only feel it.

"Oh good," Arthur said dryly. "I was afraid we'd have to stay in one place for more than a few minutes."

Gwen rolled her eyes at Arthur, but otherwise ignored him. She, Arthur, and Morgana rushed to Gaius's chambers. It's a very good thing the knights are so oblivious, because they were becoming more conspicuous as they walked.

They didn't even try to be silent as they entered Gaius's chambers. Gaius snapped awake at the sound of his door being thrown open. He lit the little candle by his bedside and had to control himself to prevent his jaw from dropping. He hadn't seen Gwen in years. She couldn't be in Camelot. That with the sight of the prince and the king's ward in their night clothes was enough to shock anyone.

"Gaius," Gwen said, a desperate tone entering her voice. "Do you know where Merlin is?"

Gaius's face went blank. "I haven't a clue," he told them.

"Gaius," Gwen said. She could see as clear as day that he was lying. "What do you know?"

Gaius glanced at Arthur then back at Gwen. "I'm afraid there's nothing I can tell you," he told them apologetically. Arthur frowned. He knew Gaius was withholding information from them.

Gwen nodded her head lightly. She had understood his message. She turned to Arthur and Morgana. "It is too late to do much else now," Gwen said. "Arthur in the morning can you send out a search party?"

"No," Arthur said, anger lacing his voice.

"No?" Gwen asked confused. She couldn't understand Arthur's refusal. He would usually do anything for Merlin, so why wasn't he trying to help him now?

"I am tired of everyone lying to me. I'm the prince and I deserve a certain level of respect. Merlin lied to me for years and nearly got himself killed because of his secret. No more lies. Just tell us where he is Gaius. Don't hold back on my account," Arthur ordered.

Three pairs of shocked eyes met Arthur. "You… you know about Merlin?" Gwen asked surprised. "Why didn't he tell me?" She froze as she processed his words. "What do you mean he nearly got himself killed because of his secret?" Gwen sounded angry. She couldn't believe Merlin had kept so much from her.

"I can't say I'm entirely surprised he didn't tell you. His first reaction when he woke up was that you were going to kill him," Arthur muttered.

"Tell me what happened," Gwen ordered him. To her surprise, Arthur obeyed her.

"It was six months ago, around the anniversary of my birth. There was a sorceress, Morgause. She had the ability to talk with the dead. She said that I could see my mother again, that I could talk to her. Merlin tried to stop me. I should have listened to him," Arthur said his face darkening. "We left at dawn and it took us less than an hour to arrive at the place, I haven't a clue what it was called, but it was a castle. My mother… she told me the circumstances of my birth. She told me why my father despises sorcery. It made me realize my father's persecution of those who practice magic was wrong. While I was talking to my mother, Morgause took out a dagger. I wasn't paying attention, but Merlin had been. When she threw the dagger at me, he put himself in front of it."

Gwen gasped. A look of horror had settled on her face. Merlin had gotten stabbed by a dagger and had never told her. Arthur continued his story with an apologetic look towards Gwen. "Morgause had started to say something, enchant some sort of spell, but Merlin beat her to it. I have no idea what he said, but it was like lightning had tried to strike her," Arthur explained. "It was the strangest thing I have ever seen. Merlin's eyes… they changed color. Morgause was able to block his magic and get away, but he still did it. He tried to kill her to keep me safe. I saw him use magic."

"I'm impressed you didn't have him killed," Morgana commented dryly.

"It's funny the decisions you make when your friend is lying on the ground dying," Arthur told her. "I was furious at first. I didn't know what I was going to do, but then Merlin fainted. Anything I was going to say seemed inconsequential in light of the fact that Merlin had been willing to die for me."

Those words hit Gwen like a ton of bricks. Just another secret Merlin had been keeping from her.


	9. Lies

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 9: Lies**

"You have come a long way sire," Gwen commented. She was proud of him. That was temporarily overshadowing her anger towards Merlin for keeping so many secrets from her.

Arthur nodded. "All thanks to Merlin," he said honestly. He hadn't realized how much Merlin had changed him until recently. "I bandaged Merlin as best as I could and when he woke, he properly bandaged himself. He begged me not to tell anyone about what had happened. He feared that if we came up with a false story someone would eventually see through it, would realize there were holes. I agreed with him. He stayed in my chambers that night. He spent the entire time convincing me that it was indeed a bad idea to kill my father for killing my mother. He even put himself in between me and my father when I tried to. If I recall my father told him he was a 'valuable ally in the fight against magic'." Arthur snorted. "But Merlin was right. I never would have forgiven myself if I had killed my father. Even if he was responsible for my mother's death."

"What do you mean?" Morgana asked confused. "How was Uther responsible for Ygraine's death?"

Out of the corner of his eye, Arthur saw Gaius drop his head and look at the floor uncomfortably. Arthur felt his anger rise. More secrets. More lies.

"I can't talk about it," Arthur said honestly. If Merlin hadn't been there he doubted he would have talked about it with him. He turned to Gaius. "You knew."

Gaius flinched at the anger in Arthur's voice. "I swore to your father I wouldn't disclose the circumstances of your birth to anyone," Gaius admitted.

Arthur closed his eyes. Secrets and lies. That's what everyone was full of. Secrets and lies. "Do you know where Merlin is?" He asked Gaius.

"Three nights ago, he went to meet Morgause as that very fortress you met her at," Gaius told Arthur quietly. "Merlin found out from a druid man that was visiting Camelot that Morgause was planning to kill the king. He went to spy on her to gather more information. I think he planned to confront her."

"Should he have been back by now?" Gwen asked.

Gaius nodded. "I didn't tell you because I knew you would pursue him if you knew. The last thing he would want would be any of you getting yourselves killed for him," Gaius explained.

Gwen's face hardened. "Well he's in luck. He won't live to see us die, because when I find him I'm going to kill him," Gwen muttered.

"Don't be too hard on him," Gaius told her. "He talks of you often. He always feels guilty when he keeps secrets from you, but he doesn't want to burden you with them. He says he has done enough harm by putting you in a position where you are not welcome in Camelot. He just wants you to be happy."

Gwen's face softened. "He's not going to do that by lying to me," Gwen said quietly. "But we must go. Arthur, do you remember how to get there?"

Arthur nodded. He would never be able to forget it.

Within the hour, they were ready to go. All three of them were on horses. "So how long have you had magic Morgana?" Arthur asked her as they rode.

"I beg your pardon?" Morgana asked surprised.

"You said you and Merlin shared a certain set of skills. I can only assume that since Merlin has no other skills you meant magic," Arthur explained jokingly.

"You're wrong you know," Gwen said quietly. "Merlin has other skills. You just fail to recognize them."

"I was joking Guinevere," Arthur told her.

"Does Merlin know that?" Gwen questioned harshly. "Does he realize when you call him stupid or clumsy or simple-minded that you are joking? Does he realize it's a joke when you call him an oaf or a fool?"

"I- I don't know," Arthur admitted quietly.

"Then maybe you should take the time out to tell him that. Merlin believes that you think him a fool and you have no idea how much that pains him," Gwen told him. She knew her words were harsh, but Arthur needed to hear them.

"I didn't think he would think I meant my words," Arthur told her.

"When you say anything often enough, it will eventually be believed," Gwen said quietly. She looked away from Arthur.

Arthur's mind was abuzz with what Gwen had told him. He had never stopped to consider the effect his words could have on Merlin. It made him feel slightly sick to know how much he had hurt his friend.

They traveled in silence until they arrived at the enchanted castle. Arthur stared at it with dread. He had hoped to never see that place again. It was bad enough he kept revisiting his mother in his nightmares. Now he was going to face the living nightmare.

When they entered the castle, a horrifying scene waited for them. Merlin was chained to a wall. His face was pale and bloody and the bruises that covered his bare skin indicated the abuse his body had been put through. From where they were standing, they couldn't tell if Merlin was even still alive. There was no sign of life in his beat up body.

"No," Gwen moaned softly. "No." Gwen rushed to Merlin and held his hand. It was cold. Very, very cold. She fell to her knees looking as if her world had just fallen apart. She couldn't lose Merlin. Not like this.

Morgana tentatively approached them. Merlin had been working with her on checking for another magical presence before he had left. She hadn't mastered it and had only faintly been able to sense him when she had tried it. She didn't sense anyone now, but she knew that didn't mean anything. Generally with practice Morgana was able to master very difficult spells. She just hadn't had time to practice this one.

They had to get Merlin out of there and quickly. Morgana put her hand on Merlin's head, praying for the life she had long learned how to sense. Unlike sensing magic, sensing life was simple. Usually a person's life burnt like a fire. It was full of warmth and light.

She was confused when she felt Merlin's. It was like a candle that was flickering. It was almost ready to go out. She had never felt life so weak. She wasn't sure if it was within her powers to help him. If the old religion decided he was close enough to death, they would require someone else's life to save him.

Morgana took a deep breath and began chanting. This was his only chance. "Ic be burhaele bin licsare mid bam sundorcraeftas baere ealdap ae!" Morgana yelled. 

"That won't work sister," a cruel voice came from the shadows.


	10. Decisions Decisions

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 10: Decisions Decisions**

Morgause stepped out into the light. She was twirling a dagger in her right hand. She was a mess, almost as bloody and bruised as Merlin. Several bruises colored her arms and she had a large cut on her shoulder that showed Merlin hadn't gone down without a fight. Her face looked swollen and bloody. "His life is almost gone. Only the most powerful of the old religion would be able to spare him. Those who possess powers you couldn't even dream of."

Morgana sighed. She knew what would need to be done. "You are wrong sister," she responded in an emotionless voice. She could hear gasps, but that didn't surprise her. Only Merlin knew that they were related and he had promised not to tell anyone. "Merlin learned long ago that I am destined to be a high priestess one day. I have the power over life and death."

"To give a life," Morgause started to say.

"You must take a life. I know," Morgana said quietly. Merlin had taught her much. She knew the laws of nature. But Merlin had to survive. Merlin was always willing to put everyone before himself. To him everyone else was more important. Just this once, it was someone's turn to put him first. Just this once, it wouldn't be Merlin taking the risks and saving the day. Just this once, Merlin would be safe.

"You're going to sacrifice yourself aren't you," Morgause asked. Her voice had a deranged amusement as if Morgana had told a funny joke.

"Morgana, you can't," Gwen said hysterically. Everything was happening too quickly. Too many lives were on the line. "Merlin would never forgive you."

"Merlin is a great man. He is a better man than any of us give him credit for. He has saved Arthur's life time and time again. He has taught me magic and has made sure that I don't become the witch I am destined to be, the witch my sister would turn me into." Morgana shot a nasty look at Morgause. Morgana had had visions of the future and until Merlin intervened and helped her find the meaning behind them, Morgause had made her feel like an outsider. Morgause had told her that only she could hope to understand and that Morgana would never be welcome in Camelot, not with the powers she possessed. Merlin helped her realize Morgause was wrong. Morgana turned back to Gwen. "He made sure you were safe. And he never asked for recognition. He never, not once expected any gratitude and for the most part he never received it. If this can be my only gift to him then it will eliminate a tiny portion of the debt I owe him," Morgana told her.

"You speak as if you know how to save him," Morgause commented.

"I do," Morgana said quietly. "I don't have the cup of life, but there are other ways to bring back the dead." Morgana hesitated. Merlin had taught her the spell, but she had never practiced it. They had never had a need to and neither of them had felt it right to just sacrifice lives to save them. But Morgana knew she could do this. For the first time since she discovered her powers, she felt powerful. She knew she could do it, because she had to. She had lived a good life. She had fought her dark future until the very end. She hadn't become the person she was destined to be, someone that would bring ruin to Camelot. She was quite proud of herself. With that in mind, she began. "Butan baet cwalu. Hrde pon aidlian. Hrde pon edian. Bot ond tile!"

The rain came down in thick curtains. Morgana could see the first signs of life coming back to Merlin and she waited for her magic to take effect on her. "Merlin?" Gwen cried, hugging him close to her. Morgana allowed relief to wash over her. She had done it.

Morgana and Gwen had been so distracted by Merlin's recovery they had forgotten to pay any attention to Morgause. She had been muttering something under her breath the entire time Morgana had been chanting. She hadn't been undoing Morgana's spell, she had just re-directed it. Morgana didn't fully understand the laws of nature, but Morgause did. She knew how to choose whose life should be sacrificed for Merlin's. More importantly, she knew whose death would make the biggest impact.

Merlin's eyes flew open as he looked at Gwen. "Merlin?" Gwen asked. "Oh Merlin!"

Merlin's arms tightened around her. "I'm right here," he whispered. "I'm right here." He looked towards Morgana angrily. "What did you do?" He sounded furious. Her life was worth far more than his. She had no right to sacrifice herself.

"I did what had to be done," Morgana said. She wasn't familiar with how long the magic should take to affect her. She didn't know how much time she had left.

Merlin got to his feet and had to lean on Gwen for support. "You shouldn't have done that," he said. "I'm not worth–"

Merlin's words were cut off by a gasp in the corner of the room. Merlin turned to see Arthur on the ground with a dagger sticking out of his chest. He could see the vines retreating. In a moment of clarity, Merlin understood. This had been Morgause's plan all along. She had refused to tell Merlin while she was taunting him. Arthur must have been tied up with the vines the moment he entered. It would have kept him from warning them about Morgause. Merlin couldn't help but stare as blood stained Arthur's tunic. His would be the life that was sacrificed for his own.

Merlin slowly turned to face Morgause. He knew his body was angry with him, but he didn't care. He would rest once his friends were safe. The fury that was filling him was unlike any he had ever felt. He hadn't been this angry when Nimueh kidnapped Morgana. He hadn't been this angry when Arthur had killed the unicorn. He had never been this angry in his life until he saw what Morgause had done.

"Eorde, lyft, fyr, waeter, hiersumap me. Eorde ac stanas hiersumap me. Ic can stanas tobrytan. Hiersumap me," Merlin roared. The castle began to shake as if there were an earthquake. Giant pieces of the castle rained down. They miraculously spared Merlin, Morgana, Gwen, and Arthur. Morgause was not so fortunate. She only narrowly escaped the larger pieces and the new cuts on her cheek showed that the smaller pieces had shown no mercy.

"Wace ierlic!" Morgause screamed, propelling Merlin back into what remained of the wall. When her spell struck Merlin, the castle stopped shaking. Merlin hit the wall. Hard. He groaned as he fell to the ground. Every cell in his body was screaming at him.

"Ic be wipdrife," Merlin said drowsily from the ground. His legs simply wouldn't support him after the abuse they had been put through in the past few days.

Morgause flew back into the wall, her head hitting with a sickening thud. "Hleap on baec," Merlin muttered. He was starting to see black in his vision. He didn't know if it would work. He didn't know if he had the strength, but if he had succeeded, his spell would have killed Morgause. If he had succeeded, Morgause's would be the life that was sacrificed. There would be a chance to spare Arthur.

Merlin wasn't sure if he had the strength, but he hoped he did. The last thing he was before the darkness consumed him was the look of panic and love on Gwen's face.


	11. Waking Up

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 11: Waking Up**

Merlin didn't know what happened next, but suddenly he was waking up in Gaius's chambers. Gwen was holding his hand and was fast asleep, her head resting against his side. Her hand was so warm. Merlin slowly became aware of how sore he felt. He didn't know why he hurt so badly at first. He couldn't remember what had happened, but when his memories returned they rushed over him in waves. Arthur. Merlin needed to make sure Arthur had survived.

Merlin tried to move without waking Gwen, but he found that impossible as he involuntarily winced in pain. Gwen's eyes flew open when she felt Merlin move. "Merlin!" She said loudly.

She put her hand over her mouth guiltily, but it was too late. She woke up Gaius. He had only just gotten to sleep. The poor man had had his work cut out for him over the last few days. There had been so much need for him.

All thoughts of Arthur flew out of Merlin's head as he looked at Gwen. Her eyes were red and swollen as if she had spent several hours crying. There were dark bags under her eyes and Merlin wondered when she had last gotten real sleep. He felt a pang of guilt. He had done that to her, it was his fault.

Gaius got out of bed and began checking Merlin. He ignored Merlin's protests that he was fine. While Gaius examined him, he told him that Arthur was alive. No matter how much Merlin asked, Gaius refused to say more. Merlin knew something bad must have happened, but Gaius just kept saying Arthur would tell him in time. Merlin groaned. He hated waiting. Gwen stroked Merlin's hand soothingly as Gaius poked and prodded Merlin's broken bones and bruises. His wounds had been far more extensive than anyone had first realized. Gwen could still remember how Gaius had said it was a miracle Merlin was still alive.

"You are healing well m'boy," Gaius said with a small smile. It would be a long time before he was comfortable doing anything, but he would heal. He would live. "I'm glad you are awake."

Merlin smiled at Gaius then looked at Gwen. He needed to talk to her. There was much she needed to know. So much he needed to apologize for. Gwen deserved the whole truth and Merlin was going to give it to her. But he also needed to check on Arthur. If Gaius was dodging his questions about Arthur, Merlin knew there was something wrong. He didn't know who he should talk to first. Fortunately, Gwen made the decision for him.

"Um Gaius," Gwen said softly. "Do you think you could go fetch Arthur?"

"Of course," Gaius said. "I'm sure the king will want to see him."

Merlin looked at Gwen confused after Gaius left. "Why would Uther want to see me?" Merlin asked her uncertainly. Suddenly feelings of dread coursed through him. There was only one reason that Uther would want to see him. "He doesn't know does he?" Merlin couldn't help how panicky he sounded. He had made it so long, survived so much without the king discovering his magic. It seemed cruel that Uther found out after everything that had happened. But Merlin wondered why he was still alive if Uther found out. Merlin suspected that may be Arthur and Morgana's doing. He would have to remember to thank them for delaying Uther until he woke up. At least now he would be able to escape.

"I'll let Arthur explain when he gets here," Gwen told Merlin. Her face darkened and she bit her lip. So much had happened. "I think he should be the one to explain it to you. And you'll be able to help him more than any of us could."

Merlin tried to ignore his confusion. Suddenly he got a panicked look on his face. "Are you safe here? If Uther is coming, he'll have you arrested," he told her worriedly. "Quick, hide in my chambers. They won't think to look there and I'm sure Arthur would pretend not to see you if Uther ordered him to search my chambers."

Gwen shook her head, an amused smile on her face. It had been too long since she had listened to Merlin ramble. "I'm perfectly safe," she promised him.

Merlin groaned as he sat up. He ached everywhere. Gwen watched him anxiously. She could only imagine the pain he must be in. "Comfortable?" She asked him.

Merlin shrugged. "As comfortable as I can be," he told her honestly.

Gwen nodded. "I was so scared that I was going to lose you," Gwen told him quietly.

"Gwen, I'm–" Merlin began to say. He owed her a huge apology.

"No Merlin. I don't want to hear that you are sorry. I was going to wait to say this, but I can't anymore. You're going to listen to me," Gwen said angrily. She could feel her eyes tearing up, but she couldn't hold it in. "You can't do this to me. You can't run off into danger and not tell me, not tell anyone. You can't get yourself hurt and then not tell me because you're afraid I'll be angry. Because now I'm furious. I love you Merlin and I trust you with all my heart, but I need you to do the same. I need you to trust me. And I need to know now if you're willing to do that. Because this can't continue if you don't. It isn't fair for me."

Merlin watched Gwen for a moment. He had a decision to make. But it wasn't really a decision. He had known the answer before he had known the question. He loved Gwen more than anything. He would rather rip out his heart than let her go.

Merlin felt worse than he ever had before. "I'm sorry Gwen," he said quietly. "I shouldn't have kept it from you. I should have told you when I got stabbed with a dagger and I should have told you when Nimueh nearly killed me. You mean more to me than anything in this world. I won't keep any more secrets from you. I only kept these things from you because I didn't want to worry you."

Merlin lifted his arm to cup her face. Even that small movement caused immense pain in his arm. Merlin could still remember how Morgause had drugged him so he couldn't use magic. Then the pain started. A physical pain and a mental pain that Merlin had never experienced before. "If you have any questions, I will answer them honestly. I promise."

"When did Nimueh nearly kill you?" Gwen asked angrily. Another secret, another lie.

"Morgana didn't tell you?" Merlin asked her surprised. He had figured while he had been captured and unconscious Gwen had been told everything.

"No. What didn't Morgana tell me?" Gwen asked.

"I will tell you," Merlin promised her. "I will tell you everything. Every little detail. But there is something I want to do first."

"What do you need to do?" Gwen asked him confused.

Merlin leaned towards Gwen and lightly brushed his lips against hers. Gwen wrapped her arms around Merlin melting into his kiss, her anger forgotten. Merlin flinched but refused to let Gwen pull back. It had been too long since he had held her and felt her warmth.

"Should I come back later?" a voice asked from the door. Merlin didn't need to look up to know it was Arthur.

Merlin had been about to say yes, but then he saw Arthur's face. "No," he said, unable to form any sort of witty comment. "Come in." He watched Arthur carefully. He knew something was wrong, but he didn't know what it was. Arthur face was blank, but the kind of blank that told you he was drowning on the inside.

"I'll leave you two to talk," Gwen said quietly. Gwen practically ran out of the room. Merlin watched her go with a perplexed expression on his face.

Merlin turned to Arthur. "What's wrong?" He asked.

Arthur opened and closed his mouth several times before he shook his head. "How are you Merlin?" Arthur asked.

"I'm fine," Merlin said. "Gaius said my wounds are healing quickly."

"Good," Arthur said. "I'm glad to hear it."

"And you? Last thing I remember is that Morgause had stabbed you," Merlin told him.

Arthur nodded. "Morgana and Gwen got us back here quickly and Gaius patched me up. I woke the day after we returned. Just in time for everything to happen," Arthur said, his face darkening. "We've all been worried about you. Gaius wasn't sure you would ever wake up. He feared you had an internal injury he would not be able to heal."

Merlin stared at Arthur. He had been out for more than a day? "How long have I been out for? And what happened while I was unconscious?" Merlin asked.

"Five days," Arthur told him. "You've been out for five days."

"Five days? And what has happened in those five days?" Merlin asked him suspiciously.

"A lot," Arthur told him.

Merlin sat patiently. When Arthur was ready, he would tell him. Merlin stared at the floor, and the wall, and Gaius's work bench. He felt restless, but he didn't want Arthur to see that. Arthur needed his help and he didn't want him to worry about something else.

Sure enough, after half an hour had passed, Arthur spoke. "My father is dead," Arthur whispered. His voice sounded like he was choking on his own words. "He's gone."


	12. Nimueh

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 12: Nimueh**

Merlin stared. Uther was dead? Suddenly everything made sense. When Gaius said the king wanted to see him, he hadn't been talking about Uther, he had been talking about Arthur. "How did it happen?" Merlin asked.

"Nimueh," Arthur muttered. He said her name like it was a curse.

"Of course," Merlin muttered. "Because one evil sorceress just wasn't enough. I suppose it makes sense. Nimueh was Morgause's teacher. She would ask Nimueh for help."

Arthur let out a soft chuckle before his face darkened. "It was the day I woke. She knew. She knew that I was weak and that you couldn't defend us. I don't know how, but she knew. There was nothing I could do. I was still hurt and everything happened so quickly." Arthur had a far off look in his eyes. Merlin knew that right now he was in the middle of whatever had happened. "She didn't come alone. My uncle, Agravaine was with her. He distracted me while Nimueh poisoned my father. I couldn't overpower him. Even when I am at my full strength, he is a formidable opponent. I was at his mercy when Morgana showed up. Morgana knocked out my uncle then went to my father. We got there too late. Nimueh had used henbane. Gaius could not cure him and Morgana had to duel Nimueh to get to my father. Nimueh hurt her and by the time Morgana woke, he was gone." Tears glistened freshly in Arthur's eyes. Merlin's jaw dropped. This was one of those moments where everything that had happened was so outrageous that is was difficult to believe, but the situation was so serious it was impossible to deny the truth of it. Merlin had only met Agravaine a handful of times. Agravaine hadn't seemed overly fond of Uther during those visits, but Merlin had thought him a kind-hearted man. Merlin never thought he would be capable of trying to kill Uther.

"I'm sorry. If I had woken up sooner…" Merlin started to say. He knew he could have changed what had happened. He knew the exact spell that could counteract henbane. If he had been stronger Uther might still be alive.

"Then my father would have had you killed. There were guards with him until he died. You would never have been able to enter unseen," Arthur cut him off. "Neither you nor Morgana is to blame. You helped keep Morgana alive which is more than any of us expected from you. Particularly after what Morgause did to you. Even after Morgana brought you back, your wounds were so serious we nearly lost you again."

"I helped keep Morgana alive?" Merlin asked confused.

"Did you know you can do magic in your sleep?" Arthur asked him. Arthur got a strange look in his eyes. "You created this strange mist that prevented Nimueh from using her powers. She had already thrown Morgana around a bit before the mist got there, but she couldn't kill her because of it. It gave Morgana the opportunity to kill her. She passed out after that though. She was out for hours."

"What makes you think I summoned the mist?" Merlin asked. He had never heard of someone being able to perform magic in their sleep before. He had never thought it possible. And he was almost certain no spell existed that could just take away someone's powers. There were creatures, and potions that could be brewed, and objects that could be enchanted.

"Gwen was with you. Nothing could tear her from your side. She said you were whispering something about how I was in danger then the mist came out of your hand," Arthur explained.

"Strange," Merlin muttered. He shifted and winced.

"It's a miracle you're still alive you know," Arthur told him. "I was here while Gwen and Gaius were examining you. I've never seen the likes of it. Did you know Gaius can do magic? Not like you or Morgana can, but he was able to heal some of your wounds." When Merlin didn't look surprised, Arthur let out an annoyed sigh. "Of course you knew. Everyone always knows before me."

"It wasn't my secret to share," Merlin explained with a shrug. He groaned. He needed to remember to not move.

"Anyway," Arthur said. He still sounded annoyed. "You had bruises everywhere and you had so many broken bones. What exactly did Morgause do to you?"

"She got angry," Merlin said quietly. "I don't even know what she was after. Once she found out I had magic, she seemed more preoccupied with asking me what I knew about magic than she did with questioning me about you. She drugged me so I couldn't escape using magic. I could still speak and think normally, but I couldn't touch my magic."

There was a long pause before them as they considered what had happened over the past few days. Merlin watched Arthur. He knew Arthur would try to look strong, but no matter what Uther's sins had been, this had to be killing Arthur.

To Merlin's surprise, Arthur made himself completely vulnerable when he broke their long silence. "I can't believe he's gone," Arthur said. He had a vacant look in his eyes.

Merlin glanced at Arthur, not entirely surprised that he saw guilt written all over Arthur's expression. Merlin should have known Arthur would blame himself. "It's not your fault," Merlin told him. "You know that, right?"

"I allowed my heart to rule my head. I saw my uncle and I simply shut down," Arthur said quietly. "If I had been stronger, maybe I would have gotten there in time. Maybe I could have overpowered him. Maybe I could have prevented my father's death."

"Nothing could have prepared you for that. If you hadn't felt betrayed and shocked by what he did, I would be worried. It's feelings like that that will help you be the king this land deserves. What happened to Agravaine?" Merlin asked Arthur.

"He's dead. Agravaine was sentenced to death after being found guilty of treason," Arthur explained sadly. "It was my first act as king. What kind of king am I if I cannot even trust my family?"

"Agravaine was your mother's brother. If he was with Nimueh, he knows the circumstances of your birth. My guess would be he sought revenge, much like you did when you first found out," Merlin pointed out. "Agravaine's betrayal doesn't make you a poor king, nor does it make you responsible for your father's death. You reacted as anyone would. If you harden your heart so you don't react as you did, you will lose part of who you are: you'll lose your compassion." Merlin studied at Arthur. He didn't know how to get through to him. "Arthur look at me!" Merlin waited until Arthur looked up at him before he continued. "You have the skills to be a great king, but you cannot allow your rule to be clouded by guilt and regret. Your people believe in you. But that means nothing if you do not believe in yourself."

Arthur looked down at the floor. He knew Merlin meant his words, but Arthur had difficulty believing them himself. How could he? He was so young to have such a large responsibility.

For several hours, Arthur sat in the little chair by Merlin's bed and just talked to him. He remembered the good times he had with his father. He remembered the bad times. He just talked and talked and talked. And Merlin listened.

Arthur wasn't okay. He was far from it. He found himself without a father and he was in charge of an entire kingdom. His people would be looking up to him expecting wisdom and justice. Arthur had to hope that one day he would be better. He didn't think he was ready to be king, but one day he hoped to be the king his people deserved. He knew with Merlin by his side, that day would come soon.


	13. The Proposal

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 13: The Proposal**

Four days passed since Merlin woke up. Since then, he had been worked to the bone by Arthur. Arthur didn't make him do work maliciously, he just had a significant more amount of work to do now. He was really depending on Merlin. He trusted Merlin with his life and often went to him for council. Merlin did his best. He knew Arthur needed him and he wasn't about to refuse his king.

Gwen had been reinstated as Morgana's maidservant and she had her work cut out for her. Morgana had refused to accept a new maidservant after Gwen had gone into hiding. Morgana wasn't the most adept at cleaning her chambers so a fairly large mess had been waiting for Gwen when she went back to work.

Merlin made his way to Gwen's house when he finished work for the night. He had barely seen Gwen since the day he woke up. Just a few minutes here and there. He hadn't dared stay the night at her house like he had so many times before when she was in hiding. Now they had to worry about the eyes that never truly rested. Anyone could see them and the last thing they needed was unpleasant gossip. That would reflect badly on Arthur and Morgana, and both of them were under far too much stress for that.

Everything was going to change now. Merlin had never been so nervous in his life, which was saying something given everything he had been through.

Merlin knocked on the door to Gwen's little house. She had moved back in after Arthur had pardoned her of the crimes Uther had found her guilty of.

Gwen opened the door and seemed surprised to see Merlin there. "Merlin?" Gwen asked surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"I missed you," Merlin told her with a small smile.

"Come in," Gwen said, moving aside to let Merlin in. Gwen sat down at the table and expected Merlin to do the same. She was surprised when Merlin nervously lingered by the door before he took a seat next to Gwen.

"Everything alright Merlin?" Gwen asked him worriedly. These past few days hadn't been easy on him.

"Everything is as good as it can be under the circumstances," Merlin told her honestly. He hesitated. "There's something I need to ask you."

"You can ask me anything," Gwen said. She was watching Merlin curiously. She wasn't sure what he was up to.

"Guinevere," Merlin said slowly. "I'm not sure how to do this." Merlin took a deep breath. He had practiced one thousand things that he could say, but somehow they never sounded right. "There comes a time in a man's life when he needs to move on to his next great adventure."

"Merlin?" Gwen asked confused.

"Gwen," Merlin said. "I think that you are a spectacular woman. You are kind and compassionate and you symbolize all things good. I have never met another like you before…"

"Merlin," Gwen said cutting him off. "Are you trying to leave me?"

"What?" Merlin asked shocked. He was trying to do quite the opposite. Why would she think that? He had to admit, his proposal may have been a little choppy, but he didn't think it had been that bad.

"I know we haven't had much time to spend together, but I love you and I know we can find a way to make this work," Gwen said. She had started to cry. She really couldn't help herself. The thought of losing Merlin was unbearable. They had been through so much together. She had only just gotten him back after fearing for days that she was going to lose him.

"Gwen," Merlin tried to say.

"I know we both have our obligations as servants. You serve the king and I serve… I'm not really sure what her title is anymore. She's not the king's ward technically, but she is practically Arthur's sister. Those are demanding jobs, I agree, but surely that's not a reason to end what we have," Gwen said pleadingly. She hated that she was begging, but she didn't know what else to do. She couldn't figure out why Merlin would want to leave her.

"Gwen," Merlin tried again.

"I'm sure if we talked to Arthur and Morgana they would give us some time off, time to spend together," Gwen rambled. And she was confident about that. Arthur cared enough for Merlin that he would grant him anything.

"Guinevere," Merlin said loudly.

Gwen swallowed whatever she was about to say and looked at Merlin confused. Merlin ignored her questioning look. "I'm trying to ask you to marry me," he told her. He looked into her chocolate brown eyes, searching for the possibility that this is what she wanted. She had made it clear she didn't want to leave him, but he wasn't sure if she was ready for this step. "I never want to leave you, in fact I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I don't want a single day to go by where I don't get to kiss you good morning and hear how your day went before we go to bed. I love you more than I thought possible. Please, do me the honor of becoming my wife," Merlin said. He didn't take his eyes off of hers once. He had no experience with this. He wasn't sure how proposals were supposed to work. He had spoken from his heart and he had to hope it would be enough. At least now there was no way she would think he was leaving her.

Gwen threw her arms around Merlin holding him tightly. "Yes, yes," she said in his ear. "A thousand times yes!"

Merlin let out the breath he had been holding. "Great," he said excitedly.

Gwen chuckled. She pulled back and pressed her lips to Merlin's. They were happier than they thought it possible to be. For years they had to sneak around to have a relationship so Uther wouldn't know about it. Merlin only got to see Gwen for a couple of hours every night. Now, their relationship would be able to truly start. They were excited for this chapter of their lives.

They were to be married by the king at the end of the month. Arthur traveled to Ealdor with Gwen and Morgana to perform the ceremony. When Merlin had requested that they have the ceremony in Ealdor, Gwen readily agreed, but she was a little upset when he insisted on leaving early. He had told her to stay and travel with Arthur and Morgana. What Merlin would need an entire week to prepare, Gwen had no idea.

That is, she had no idea until she stepped foot into Ealdor. Merlin wasn't the only one waiting to greet her, Arthur, and Morgana when they arrived.

For a moment, Gwen just stared. She didn't quite believe her eyes. For standing next to Merlin was her brother, Elyan.


	14. Reunions

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 14: Reunions**

Gwen wasn't conscious of moving as she walked towards her brother. She almost felt guilty when she practically ignored Merlin, but she had other things on her mind. Her brother was here. This was the best wedding gift she could have asked for.

When Gwen approached him, Elyan immediately opened his arms, welcoming her into his embrace. He kissed the top of her head. He had missed his sister. It had been so long since he had last seen her. It was hard to imagine that this beautiful woman before him was the little girl that made sure he had breakfast in the morning, patched his clothing when they ripped, and had bandaged all his scraped knees when he was a boy.

"Elyan," Gwen sobbed into his chest. She couldn't help her tears. She wasn't usually emotional, but it was like seeing a ghost. She hadn't seen her brother in years. Not since he had run off to try and make a name for himself. She hadn't even known if he was safe.

It had been a huge change for Gwen when he left. She had practically raised Elyan. She had spent her free time making sure he was fed and properly clothed. She had watched him grow from a little boy into a man. And then suddenly he was gone. No note, no goodbye. He was just gone.

"Gwen," Elyan said, rubbing circles into her back. "Everything is okay. I'm back."

Gwen turned to Merlin. She could see him talking to Arthur while they watched her. "How did you get him here?" She asked Merlin amazed. He had done so much for her. It made her love him even more and she hadn't even known that was possible.

Merlin shrugged. "It wasn't that difficult," he said nonchalantly.

"Not difficult?" Elyan asked incredulously. "I'm not sure how he found me. He wouldn't tell me. But he broke me out of prison and then told me I was attending your wedding or he would let Cenred's men catch me and arrest me again. He literally refused to move to safety until I promised that I would be here and gave him my blessing. Which if any man goes through that length to get my blessing to marry my sister, he deserves it. Oh and he made me promise that I would move back to Camelot and find work there."

"Yes," Arthur said, cutting into their conversation. "I believe that Camelot could use a knight like you. And I'm not just saying that because someone threatened to use their magic to make me fat if I didn't."

"Merlin," Gwen chastised. She had to bite her cheek to hide her chuckle. She was impressed with the lengths Merlin had gone through to get Elyan here and to get him to stay.

"I wasn't referring to Merlin," Arthur said. He glanced at Morgana who was still sitting on her horse. She looked like she was immensely enjoying herself.

"Was I the only one that didn't know about this?" Gwen asked surprised. Arthur was in on it. Morgana was in on it.

"Yes," four voices answered her.

"Merlin got us all in on it," Morgana explained. "He wanted to surprise you. Naturally, he left me the hard part of convincing Arthur to employ Elyan when he returned."

"Thank you," Gwen whispered to Merlin.

"You're welcome," Merlin answered. His eyes were shining. It had worked. "I know we agreed no secrets, but I felt that this was an exception."

"It was," Gwen agreed, tightening her arms around her brother. "It most certainly was. But how did you find him?"

"I had a little help," Merlin admitted. He glanced at Gwen, he knew she was going to be furious at him. He had promised her no more secrets, but he honestly had just never thought to tell her about this. He looked behind Gwen and smiled at something.

Gwen turned and was surprised to see Lancelot. He was holding a little girl who was fast asleep on his shoulder. "Lancelot?" Gwen asked. She turned to Merlin. "You've had a busy week haven't you?"

"Just got back round nightfall last night," Merlin told her with a nod. He had been worried he wouldn't get back before Gwen so he had forced himself, Elyan, and Lancelot to ride all day with only the shortest breaks for water and food.

"Perhaps we should find a place to sit. I want to hear the whole story," Gwen said. She turned to Lancelot. "Who is this?" She gently stroked the child's cheek.

"This is my daughter," Lancelot told her. "Her name is Lilya."

"She's gorgeous," Gwen cooed.

Lancelot smiled. "She looks just like her mother," he said quietly.

"Speaking of whom. She's going to kill me if you're here much longer. I promised her I was only going to steal you for an hour or so," Merlin reminded him. "Especially after I took you for nearly a week. I don't think she is too happy with me…"

"You're… wife is here?" Gwen asked uncertainly.

Lancelot and Merlin exchanged uneasy glances. "She's my fiancé… it's rather a long story," Lancelot explained. "We're hoping to marry soon." Lancelot sent Merlin a meaningful look. Merlin nodded.

Gwen made a mental note to ask Merlin about that later. "Any chance I can meet her?" Gwen asked curiously.

Lancelot hesitated. "I'm not sure that would be a good idea… she's a little sensitive towards anyone who lives in Camelot right now... it took Merlin hours to convince her that she could trust him," Lancelot explained.

Gwen's brow furrowed. "Why w–" Gwen started to ask.

"Let her meet Gia. And let Arthur meet her," Merlin told Lancelot. "He has a right to know. And if he can appease her, it might change her whole outlook on Camelot. She might feel safe again."

Gwen and Arthur looked at each other confused. They were completely lost. Lancelot and Merlin seemed to be having a private conversation. Finally Lancelot relented. "I suppose this was going to happen eventually, but when Gia gets angry, I'm blaming you," Lancelot warned.

"I'll accept the blame," Merlin agreed with a small smile. "Gia likes me. She won't stay angry very long."

Lancelot grudgingly led them to the Ealdor Inn.

Elyan and Morgana had been spotted by Merlin's mother on the way. She had promised to feed them.

Gwen, Merlin, and Arthur all followed Lancelot up the stairs to a room on the second floor of the inn. Lancelot entered. "Gia?" He called. "I've brought a couple of guests. Merlin's doing."

There was no answer, but neither Merlin nor Lancelot seemed surprised. They entered the room. Arthur looked around. He had never had need to stay in an inn before. It was a new experience for him. It was rather plain with a bed and a wardrobe.

It took Arthur a moment to realize that someone was sitting on the bed. A woman was sitting up, propped against a pillow. She was drawing something on a piece of parchment paper.

Once she turned the paper, Arthur realized she hadn't been drawing, but had been writing. "Is that the girl?" the paper said.

Merlin smiled. "Gia, I'd like you to meet my fiancé Guinevere," he said slowly.

Gia turned the parchment so she could write on it. "Who's the chubby boy?" she wrote.

Merlin chuckled. "Told you that you were getting fat," he muttered to Arthur. Merlin's face immediately became grave. "Gia… this is King Arthur."

Gia's face contorted with anger. "Get him out of here," she wrote.

"Let me explain," Merlin pleaded. "He's not like Uther. Give him a chance."

Gia frowned, watching Merlin for any sign that he was not being completely honest. If it were anyone else, she wouldn't have given a second thought. But after the goodness she had seen in Merlin, she could not deny him. After a moment she nodded. She would give the prince a chance.


	15. The Sins of the Father

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 15: The Sins of the Father**

Gia looked towards Lancelot expectantly. Lancelot sighed. "I must apologize on behalf of Gia. She cannot speak. It is one of the reasons our wedding has been delayed. The other is that she cannot walk," Lancelot explained quietly. "Merlin says that he can repair the damage in her legs and vocal chords so that she can walk and talk again."

Gia smiled at Merlin affectionately. Arthur and Gwen stared at Merlin. It seemed that he had made a promise to everyone that he had ever met. It was one of the reasons Gwen loved him so much. He couldn't resist the urge to help someone in need.

"It happened only a week after Lilya was born," Lancelot said. His eyes got a far off look. "It was a little over two years ago. We had been staying in a village on the outskirts of Camelot, Gilling. Gia's village had been less then welcoming of the fact that we had had a child out of wedlock." Lancelot blushed. "It's not something I'm entirely proud of, but I wouldn't change a thing. I have the most perfect daughter in the world because of it."

"Some knights from Camelot raided our village. They had their orders from Uther. They were searching for a sorcerer that they believed was hiding in the city. No one knew of a sorcerer and we told them that, but they were relentless. There was a little boy that got in their way. He didn't know better, he just wanted to see what they were doing. They had tried to harm him, but Gia got in their way. She was 'punished' according to your laws for interfering with an investigation," Lancelot explained angrily. Lilya squirmed in his arms a little bit as she woke up. She looked around unhappily.

Without asking, Lancelot handed Lilya to Merlin. Merlin bounced her a little bit and Lilya rested her head against his shoulder. She looked so comfortable in his hold. Merlin walked back to Gwen's side.

"Gia spent nearly two weeks under the care of the physician in Gilling. I was told that she wouldn't survive the injuries she had. I wrote to Uther begging for help and I got a reply that said that it was our fault for interfering. We had nowhere to turn to, so we turned to our king and he denied us help. I was angry, but it was harder on Gia. Uther practically said she deserved to die in his response. Uther was Gia's last hope. It was then that I found Merlin sneaking out to the woods. I told him what had happened and he arranged for Gaius to examine Gia. We've been staying in Ealdor ever since," Lancelot explained. "Merlin's village has been very helpful. Merlin even gifted us with enchanted parchment. Whatever Gia writes will disappear after a moment. It gives her the chance to communicate without having to constantly purchase parchment."

"You've known about this for two years?" Gwen asked, turning to Merlin. She was fuming. He had promised her no more secrets.

"I honestly forgot," Merlin told her guiltily. "With everything that had happened and everything that I had to tell you about Arthur and Morgana, it slipped my mind. And then when I remembered I couldn't exactly tell you because Lancelot was helping me find Elyan."

Gwen huffed and looked away from him. She knew she would forgive him, but he wouldn't get off the hook so easily. He had promised her no more secrets.

Gia started to write again. "Don't be so hard on him. He is a good man," she wrote.

Gwen smiled. "He is a good man," she agreed. She squeezed Merlin's hand. "He's just a good man in a whole lot of trouble for keeping secrets from his fiancé."

Gia smiled wider. "I've found it's difficult to stay mad at him when he has so much good in him," she wrote. "When I found out he was from Camelot, I tried to throw a lantern at him. He didn't even blame me."

Gwen chuckled. "I'm sorry about what happened to you," she said seriously.

"As am I," Arthur said speaking for the first time. "I knew of the raid in Gilling. We had reports of a sorcerer residing there. My men were sent out to investigate. I was ordered not to go as I had other matters to attend to. I had no idea that my men had hurt any of the villagers. The report that was submitted to me stated that it was a routine sweep and that they had randomly questioned villagers but hadn't gained any new information. I don't know if my father knew of what they had done at the time, but I had no idea. And I am especially sorry for my father's harsh response. I can only imagine that his pride would not allow him to take responsibility for the wrong our knights committed."

Gia didn't take her eyes off of Arthur. It was clear she didn't trust him. "I know this can in no way undo the harm that has been done to you, but I would like to offer you a lifetime of comfort. Anything you desire, I would be happy to give you," Arthur told her. It pained him to know what his knights had done. He would personally speak with the knights that went on that raid. He was sure it was on record somewhere.

"You cannot buy my forgiveness Pendragon," Gia wrote.

"That was not my intention," Arthur told her sincerely. "A grievous wrong has befallen you and it is because of the men that I have trained. Men that I should have been responsible for. I can in no way fix what happened, but I hope to try. Lancelot saved Camelot once. He managed to slay a griffin that had bested many people."

Lancelot and Merlin exchanged guilty looks. "Please don't tell me that it was you Merlin," Arthur said. He hadn't missed their silent exchange. He pinched the bridge of his nose. Just once, he would like to find out that something he had held to be true wasn't wrong. Just once. Is that too much to ask for? "Please say you had nothing to do with the griffin."

"I would say that Sire, but you directly ordered me not to lie to you after you found out about my magic," Merlin pointed out. "Lancelot did the hard part. I only did the part where I enchanted the spear so it could actually pierce the griffin."

Arthur groaned. "I'm always the last one to find out about things," he said grumpily.

"Tell me about it," Gwen agreed.

Arthur shook his head. "I forgot what I was talking about," Arthur admitted sheepishly. "But this isn't my way of buying your forgiveness. It's my way of ensuring that you can live comfortably after my kingdom has wronged you. I do not blame you if you despise me, but I hope you will accept my offer."

Gia frowned slightly. She turned towards Merlin. Merlin smiled at her smugly. He knew Arthur had convinced her. "You were right," she wrote. "He is different."


	16. Eilonwy

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 16: Eilonwy**

Four days later, they were married. Gwen had insisted that Lancelot and Gia attend the wedding as honored guests. In Ealdor that only meant that they got to sit closer to the bride and groom, but Gia still seemed flattered by the offer.

It was at the ceremony that Arthur met Eilonwy.

Eilonwy was one of Merlin's childhood friends. She had only been born a week and a half after him. Things had been less than pleasant between them since she ended things between her and Will. They never really were a thing, but she had let him believe they were and Will had been crushed when she told him she didn't have feelings for him. Merlin hadn't chosen sides, not exactly. He had just stopped spending as much time with Eilonwy during the day when Will could see them. Merlin was grateful that they were able to put that behind each other now.

Arthur hadn't taken his eyes off her since she walked up to Merlin. Once there seemed to be a lull in the people congratulating Merlin and Gwen, Arthur approached Merlin.

"Who is that?" He asked quietly. Merlin looked towards where Arthur was staring and had to suppress an eye roll.

"No Arthur," Merlin told him. It wasn't that Merlin didn't trust Eilonwy, because he did. She just had a history of playing with men until they were emotionally attached and then leaving them. Will wasn't the first man she did that to and he undoubtedly wasn't the last. It wasn't Eilonwy's fault, not exactly. But she should know better than to do that to a man when she knows nothing can happen between them. Merlin didn't want to risk Arthur getting emotionally invested in someone, particularly when he was still so vulnerable after his father's death.

"Why not? She's beautiful," Arthur said.

Merlin resisted the urge to slap him. Eilonwy was beautiful alright. She had wavy blonde hair that fell to her waist and eyes that were bluer than Arthur's. But beauty wasn't everything. "Eilonwy's too much like you. She's far too stubborn. Can you imagine if you got into an argument with her? It would end right there because both of you would refuse to apologize and accept you are wrong," Merlin told him. It wasn't a lie. Not entirely. It just wasn't the whole truth. There was an endless list of reasons that Eilonwy and Arthur would never get to be together.

Arthur sighed. "Perhaps you are right," he said grumpily. "I suppose it wouldn't matter anyway. I would never be allowed to marry a commoner."

"Why does it matter? You've never cared about this before. Why now?" Merlin asked him curiously.

Arthur hesitated. "I'm king now Merlin," Arthur said quietly. "My people expect me to choose a queen to rule by my side. The council told me that if I don't pick a bride soon it will be arranged."

"But surely they cannot do that," Merlin argued. "You're the king. You make the laws. You've already started to allow commoners to swear into knighthood, why should this be any different? Surely a union of love is more powerful than any other." Merlin hesitated. "Just that union of love should not be with Eilonwy."

Arthur sighed. "It's not that simple," Arthur explained. "My people expect–"

"They expect you to rule with a kind heart and they expect you to be happy," Merlin cut him off. "Don't allow a group of old men that have nothing better to do with their time than plan arranged marriages, to dictate your life. You're king. You decide how you want your life to happen."

Arthur looked at the floor. He wished he could believe what Merlin said, but it was hard to believe his people would want him to defy centuries of tradition just to be happy. Merlin groaned in frustration when he saw his words hadn't effected Arthur. "You're going to stop thinking about arranged marriages and you are going to go enjoy yourself," Merlin ordered.

"Is that an order?" Arthur asked amused.

"Yes," Merlin warned. "Now go!"

Arthur reluctantly joined the throngs of people that where talking and laughing. His feeble attempts at making conversation hadn't been successful and less than an hour later, Arthur found himself sitting on a bale of hay watching the people of Ealdor dance and be merry while he brooded and sipped his mead.

A shadow crossed over Arthur and he looked up to see Eilonwy. "Is this seat taken?" She asked, pointing to the hay bale next to Arthur.

Arthur shook his head. "All yours," he said gesturing to her seat.

"Is everything alright. I couldn't help but notice that you seem… less than happy to be here," Eilonwy observed. "Is King Arthur too good to celebrate with us common folk?"

Arthur was taken aback by the bitterness in her voice. He chose to ignore her last comment and instead answered her earlier concern. "I am happy to be here. Truly I am," Arthur said. "I'm happy for Merlin. I just have pressing matters weighing down my thoughts."

"Ah yes. I'm sure the mighty king has far more important things than celebrating. Merlin's just a servant after all," Eilonwy taunted. For all the good things Merlin had said about the young king, Eilonwy had expected him to be different, but Arthur was proving to be just like every other man in a position of power. He cared for nothing but himself.

"Have I wronged you in some way?" Arthur asked her confused. He had never met this woman before in his life yet she spoke to him as if he had scorned her. Any feelings of infatuation he had for her disappeared. "If I have tell me."

"It is not what you have done, it is what you are going to do," Eilonwy said. "It's what everyone who has any semblance of power inevitably does. You care more for the power you possess than your people. All that matters to you–"

"Do not pretend to know me," Arthur said in a harsh voice. "You do not know what is in my heart, nor do you know how I feel about my people. I don't care if you make assumptions about my character, but do not tell me that I do not care for my people."

Eilonwy looked taken aback by his outburst. She opened and closed her mouth several times before she found the question she wanted to ask him. "If you care so much for your people why do you not show it?" She asked him.

"What do you mean?" Arthur asked confused.

"You claim to care for your people, yet you sit at your servant's wedding looking like you'd rather be anywhere else," Eilonwy told him.

"Stop calling him my servant," Arthur told her. He was really starting to get annoyed with this girl. Merlin was right. She was far too much like him. "Merlin is not just my servant. I would not be here if he was. I am here, because I am taking a week away from all the petty problems in Camelot to be here for my best friend. I am not without burden which is why I sit here. Even when I am not there, I still feel my people suffering, I still know their sorrows. I know that while I sit here trying to be merry, problems are arising that my people cannot come to me for solutions about because I am not there. I hate knowing that I am not there for them, but I endure it, because my friendship with Merlin is just as important as my crown. Now if you'll excuse me."

Arthur stood up. He had every intention of leaving. He could feel bad for himself somewhere else. "Wait," Eilonwy called, stopping him in his tracks. "I'm sorry. I am but a peasant. I know nothing of the burden you carry. I may have misjudged you. I have never met a prince nor a king that spoke with such love for his people."

"And you've met many princes and kings?" Arthur asked skeptically.

"I've met enough to form my judgments," Eilonwy said with a shrug. She had been denied help by many which had made her resent all men that hold power. Eilonwy hesitated. "From past experience, I've heard of an excellent way to cheer oneself up."

"What might that be?" Arthur asked skeptically.

"Joining the festivities," Eilonwy said, extending her hand to Arthur.


	17. Wedding Night

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 17: Wedding Night**

Arthur stared at her outstretched hand for several seconds. He was so confused. She went from hating him to offering to dance with him. He would never understand women.

After a moment Arthur hesitantly stood up and accepted her hand. She literally whisked him away, introducing him to people and teaching him a dance native to Ealdor. Arthur wasn't going to say he had a good time, because he was far too stubborn to admit he was wrong, but he didn't not enjoy himself.

Arthur found himself truly laughing for the first time since his father died. He was filled with such joy, such peace. Even if this was only to last the night, he was grateful for Eilonwy. It seemed she knew exactly what to say to make him laugh. For one night, he wasn't King Arthur with the weight of his people on his shoulder. He was Arthur who was allowed to dance and be merry.

As the festivities died down, he and Eilonwy went back to the hay bales they had sat down on before. "You were right," Arthur admitted reluctantly. "I do feel better."

"Of course I was," Eilonwy said with a grin. She hesitated. "I was wrong as well. You really aren't like other kings. You're different. Good different."

Arthur smiled at her. Perhaps it was because the darkness made him feel like he could do anything, or the fact that Eilonwy looked so beautiful in the flickering candle light that illuminated Ealdor, or the fact that for the first time in a long time, Arthur felt like he was where he should be, but Arthur found himself leaning towards Eilonwy. He wouldn't normally be so forward, but after the night they had spent together, it felt right. He didn't take his eyes off of her. At any sign of objection, he would pull back. He didn't want to force her into anything.

She didn't object. When he got closer, her eyes fluttered shut in anticipation of their moment. It never happened.

An uncomfortable cough from behind them pulled them from their moment. Arthur and Eilonwy turned to see Merlin. "Eilonwy, your father is looking for you," Merlin told her in an even voice.

"Of course," Eilonwy said. A sour expression came across her face.

She kissed Arthur's cheek before she stood up. She went over to Merlin and gave him a hug, once again congratulating him.

"How bad is it going to be when I go home?" She asked Merlin fearfully when she pulled back from the hug. She spoke quietly so only Merlin could hear her.

"He didn't see you sitting with Arthur, so he shouldn't be too bad," Merlin told her quietly. "But you never know with your father. I just didn't want him to find you. Then it would be very bad. I'm sorry."

"No it's alright. Thank you," she whispered.

"If it gets too bad or if he tries anything, you know my floor is always an option. My mother won't mind. She's all alone in that house I think she would welcome the company," Merlin offered her.

Eilonwy nodded. She knew she would never go to Hunith. Merlin was the only one she truly trusted with her secret. "Goodbye," she whispered.

"What was that about?" Arthur asked angrily when Eilonwy was out of earshot.

"I told you not to get involved Arthur," Merlin said turning to face him. He was furious. "This won't end well for either of you. Look past her beauty and tell me you truly want to be with her."

"It's too soon to tell," Arthur answered honestly. "But I really do like her. She speaks to me like you did once. She didn't let me be an arrogant ass. She made me enjoy myself. I've never met a woman like her before."

Merlin groaned. This was exactly what he had been trying to avoid. "You only just met her. Are you sure you feel this way? Perhaps you had too much mead or the adrenaline from the celebration is getting to you?" He asked hopefully.

"Why don't you want this to work? Answer me honestly," Arthur ordered.

"It's not my place to tell you," Merlin said quietly. He started to walk away.

"Where are you going?" Arthur asked surprised. Merlin was just walking away?

"I'm the groom Arthur. It's my wedding night," Merlin said with a blush.

Arthur couldn't help but chuckle. "Gwen is waiting for you?" He asked amused.

If possible, Merlin's blush deepened. He reluctantly nodded. "I told her I wanted to say goodnight to you," Merlin admitted.

"Well goodnight," Arthur said. His eyes were shining with merriment. "Good luck."

With that, Merlin walked away shaking his head. Gwen was waiting for him in the distance. Merlin took her hand in his and kissed it before they began walking back to the inn. Gwen had been staying in the inn while Merlin stayed at his mother's house. They had decided the inn might be more appropriate for them to stay in after they were married. Once they were in the safety of their room, Gwen turned to Merlin. "Did you get there in time?" She asked Merlin anxiously.

Merlin nodded at her. "I believe so," he told her.

A relieved look crossed across her face. "I'm glad. How furious was Arthur?" She asked. For the past three days, she had listened to Merlin tell her everything. Every secret Merlin had ever held close to his heart, he shared with her. He had told her all about Eilonwy.

"Not as angry as I expected," Merlin told her. "I didn't think he would, but he really likes Eilonwy. What do I do?"

"You think about it in the morning," Gwen told him. She wrapped her hand around the back of his neck. "That problem will still be there in the morning. It's time for us to be man and wife." Gwen leaned up and kissed him eagerly.

The moment their lips touched, Merlin forgot about everything. He forgot about Arthur and he forgot about Eilonwy. For in that moment the only thing that mattered was him and Gwen.

Merlin woke up the next morning, with his arms wrapped around Gwen. His heart was beating fast as he observed his bride. As she stirred in his embrace, he gently kissed her forehead.

Her eyes flew open and she looked at Merlin. "I could get used to this," she told him quietly.

"As could I," he agreed. He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. "Good morning."

"Morning," Gwen said cheerfully. They stayed in bed for nearly an hour more before Gwen finally got up. "Go on," she said quietly.

"What?" Merlin asked her confused.

"I know you want to talk to Eilonwy," Gwen said. "I'll go talk with Elyan, or maybe I'll visit Gia and Lancelot. I'll be fine."

Merlin kissed her again. "Thank you," he told her. "I promise after I talk to her, I'll stop worrying about Arthur."

"No you won't," Gwen said amused. "Arthur is your destiny. You can no more stop worrying about him that you can stop breathing. I knew what I was getting myself into when I married you. I understand. Sometimes you have to put him before me. I accept that."

"I love you," Merlin told her. He didn't know how he had managed to find a woman as amazing as Gwen. He hardly felt he deserved her.

"I love you too," Gwen told him. She accepted one last kiss from him. "Now go."


	18. Eavesdropping

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 18: Eavesdropping**

Merlin made his way to the house Eilonwy shared with her father, Carter and her younger brother, Evi. Her brother was only three years younger than her. Their mother had died giving birth to Evi.

Merlin knocked on the door gently, hoping Eilonwy's father would not be awake. Luck was not in his favor. Eilonwy's father opened the door, looking less than pleased. His expression didn't improve when he spotted Merlin. "Hello sir," Merlin said respectfully. "My wife had a question for Eilonwy. Something about dress colors. Do you think Eilonwy could spare a few minutes to speak with her?"

"Wife already driving you crazy eh?" Carter father asked amused. He rubbed his bearded chin. "I'll have to see if Eilonwy's up to it. She had a nasty fall last night."

Merlin winced at that. He was grateful Carter didn't notice that. Merlin wasn't supposed to know about Carter and most likely Eilonwy would face his wrath if ever he found out.

"May I see her?" Merlin asked. "I've been apprenticing with the physician. Perhaps I could be of some assistance."

Carter hesitated before he allowed Merlin in. Merlin walked down the familiar hallways to Eilonwy's chambers.

He knocked. He waited until Eilonwy called for him to enter. Then he walked into her room. She was a mess. Merlin could see fresh bruises on her arms. He knew they would be covered when she got dressed properly, but Merlin still felt a pang of sadness. "How are you feeling?" He asked her anxiously.

"Sore, but not too bad," Eilonwy told him honestly. "Sometimes I'm too clumsy for my own good." Merlin knew Eilonwy was trying to look strong because her father was watching, but Merlin could see the tears forming behind her eyes. "Was there something you wanted?"

"Yes," Merlin told her. "Gwen wanted your opinion on a dress. I'm not really sure what exactly. I don't speak dress, but do you think you could help her?"

"Of course," Eilonwy said. "Just give me a moment to get dressed."

Merlin nodded and stepped outside with her father. "Where did she fall down?" He asked Carter.

"On the way back from the celebration she lost her footing and fell against a wagon," Carter explained.

"I thought as much. That's what it looked like," Merlin lied. In the corner of his eye Merlin thought he saw a pleased expression flash across Carter's face. When he looked closer, it was gone.

Several minutes later, Eilonwy emerged from her bedroom. She was wearing a shawl that would effectively hide her bruises. Merlin led them to the room at the inn that he and Gwen had stayed in. Just in case Carter was watching them, he wanted to make it seem like they really were meeting Gwen.

"You don't speak dress?" Eilonwy asked amused.

Merlin rolled his eyes, but ignored her question. He didn't want to risk anyone overhearing them on the way to the inn.

What Eilonwy and Merlin were unaware of was Arthur. He had wanted to speak to Eilonwy that morning and was surprised when he saw her leaving her house with Merlin. He followed them to a room in the inn and waited for the door to close to press his ear against it. He knew it was wrong to eavesdrop, but he needed to know what they were doing.

"What did he do to you?" Merlin asked her anxiously when the door closed behind him.

"The usual," Eilonwy said bitterly. She couldn't hold in her tears anymore. "He saw me dancing with Arthur earlier and he didn't like it. He reminded me that he makes the rules." Eilonwy shivered. She could still feel her father's hands against her, squeezing and punching. "He had been drinking so he couldn't help himself." Merlin frowned. He knew Eilonwy loved her father, but he wished he would stop making excuses for him. There was no reason for a man to harm his daughter.

"I'm sorry," Merlin told her. "I really didn't think he saw you. If I had known, I never would have let you go back to that house. I knew he was a little drunk, but I didn't think he would hurt you again. Do you think anything is broken?"

Arthur's jaw dropped. He may have complained about his father often, but Uther never raised his hand to Arthur. He couldn't imagine anyone doing that to their child. And Merlin had said again. This wasn't a one-time occurrence. And Merlin knew about it! That's what he meant when he said it wasn't his place to tell Arthur why he didn't want him and Eilonwy to be together.

"I don't think so. Something is weird with my shoulder, but I'm not sure what," Eilonwy told him.

"Let me see it," Merlin ordered. Eilonwy took off her shawl and pulled down the sleeve of her dress. To most, this would be awkward and uncomfortable, but this wasn't the first time Merlin has had to patch her up. They were both used to it. "Ic be purhaele bin licsare."

Eilonwy let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you," she said gratefully.

"It's the least I could do," Merlin told her. He bit his lip. "I'm so sorry that this happened to you."

"It's not your fault," Eilonwy said. "I was foolish. I should not have spent so much time with Arthur. I should have been weary of my father."

"You weren't foolish," Merlin corrected. "You just are hopeful. You want to find someone to love you, but you can't do this to Arthur. He is a good man. You can't let him fall in love with you then leave him to protect him from your father. He isn't like the other men."

"I know," Eilonwy told Merlin seriously. "I wasn't expecting to, but I really like him. It's not like with Will or Henry or Goffrey. My feelings for him are true. I know I cannot be with him, but I've never felt this way about another man before. I want to be with him. I want to get to know him and dance with him and laugh with him. Last night was the most amazing night of my life. Just for a few hours, he helped me forgot."

Merlin groaned. Only Arthur. Only Arthur would find the one girl that he can never be with. "What are you going to do then?" Merlin asked her.

"I don't know," Eilonwy admitted. "I've thought about just leaving. I could tell Arthur the truth and maybe he could take me away from here, but I could never leave Evi. If I leave, he might be my replacement. I would rather live with my father until I die than have my brother face the same thing."

"Why not take your brother with you?" Merlin asked curiously. "I know I've asked you this before, but why not? What's stopping you?"

"I don't want Evi to feel like he was a burden," Eilonwy said quietly. "Ealdor is his home. I don't want to take it from him."

Arthur couldn't stand idly behind the door any longer. His head was spinning with what he had found out and now he knew why Merlin had warned him against Eilonwy and why he had interfered with them last night.

He knew they would be furious that he had been eavesdropping, but he had to make his presence known.

Arthur walked in without knocking. Their reaction was instantaneous. They stared at Arthur as if they couldn't believe he was there. "Arthur," Merlin said cheerfully, recovering first. "What brings you here?"

Arthur ignored him. He was staring at Eilonwy who was returning his eye contact. "You know it's rude to listen in on other people's conversations," Eilonwy told him quietly.

Arthur shrugged. "I just want to help you," he told her seriously.

"How?" Eilonwy asked. For the first time since Arthur met her, she looked tired and vulnerable.

"I don't know," Arthur told her seriously.


	19. The Plan

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Chapter 19: The Plan**

"Why do you want to help me?" Eilonwy asked. She was watching Arthur carefully. He was a king. He wasn't supposed to care about people like her. But he made her feel special. He made her feel like he didn't care that she was just a commoner. Eilonwy hadn't expected to have true feelings for Arthur. When she had sat down by him, she had intended to make him feel bad for neglecting his friend, but he wasn't what she had expected. He made her reconsider everything she knew about royalty or people in power. He made her give him a chance and she had a great time getting to know him. One night wasn't enough, but it made her certain of her feelings.

Arthur hesitated under her intense stare. He glanced at Merlin uncomfortably then decided he didn't care. Merlin already knew he had feelings for Eilonwy and Arthur suspected that what he was about to say wouldn't stay secret for long. "I've never felt this… this connection with another woman before," Arthur explained. "Last night you spoke to me as if I were your equal, not your king. Well technically I'm not your king, I'm not yours, I mean your king. Cenred is your king, well he's not yours either…" Arthur shook his head. He was rambling. He took a deep breath to compose his thoughts. When he was certain he wouldn't make a fool of himself, he continued. "But you spoke to me honestly and from your heart. Other than Merlin, no one dares speak to me like that. It was a nice change even if you didn't have the kindest things to say. And then we danced together and we spent the night talking. When we parted, my only thought was that I hoped I would get to see you soon. I've never felt that way before." Arthur was staring at the floor. He had never been so embarrassed in his life. Usually he wouldn't have revealed so much, but his mind seemed to not be attached to his body right now. So much for not making a fool of himself. But he didn't care how stupid he had sounded. He was too full of fear that he truly wouldn't be able to see Eilonwy again.

When he looked up Eilonwy was smiling at him. Arthur saw out of the corner of his eye that Merlin was smirking. He internally groaned. He knew that smirk. Merlin was never going to let him forget this.

"So what's the plan?" Eilonwy asked after a moment had passed.

"You and your brother could move to Camelot," Arthur offered. "I know you don't want to take your brother away from Ealdor, but if he had work in Camelot would he be opposed to it?"

Eilonwy bit her lip. "I don't know," she said cautiously. "My brother would never leave here to go skivvying after royalty… no offense." She glanced at Merlin apologetically.

Merlin rolled his eyes. "I do not go skivvying…" He started to say.

"Merlin," both Arthur and Eilonwy said at the same time. It was skivvying. There was no point in denying it.

Merlin's expression turned sour but he didn't say anymore.

Arthur turned to Eilonwy. "What does your brother enjoy doing?" He asked.

"Well he's a talented blacksmith. He apprenticed with the blacksmith for a couple of years until he passed away. Ealdor hasn't had much need of his talents since then," Eilonwy answered.

Merlin's face darkened and Arthur understood why. "I happen to know that Camelot could use a blacksmith," Arthur told Eilonwy quietly. "He wouldn't be working in the palace, but he would have his own workshop in the village." Out of respect for Gwen's father, he had left her father's blacksmith workshop alone. He didn't think she would mind if someone started to use it again.

Eilonwy stared at Arthur. "Are you certain about this?" She asked him uncertainly.

"I do not know what is going to become of us," Arthur told her honestly. "But regardless of whether this ends in friendship or a deeper companionship, I would not see you hurt."

"Very well," Eilonwy said. "I shall speak to Evi about this."

A knock on the door interrupted their conversation. "Merlin?" A voice called.

Merlin couldn't help the smile that spread across his face. "Come in Gwen," he called. Gwen slowly opened the door.

She was holding Lilya. "I told Lancelot we would watch her this afternoon," Gwen explained.

Merlin nodded and smiled at Lilya. Lilya stuck out her tongue and made little spit bubbles as a greeting. Merlin chuckled. "Before we leave to go back to Camelot, I have to heal Gia of that which ails her," Merlin reminded himself.

Lilya reached towards him even though she was on the other side of the room. Gwen walked over towards Merlin and handed him the child. "Did you have a nice chat?" She asked curiously. She glanced at Arthur and Eilonwy.

"It was very informative," Merlin told her. A smile touched his lips. He glanced at Arthur and Eilonwy. "Eilonwy, I could go speak to Evi if you like."

"I would appreciate that Merlin," Eilonwy said with a smile.

Merlin squeezed Gwen's hand and knew she would follow him. "What was that about?" Gwen asked curiously.

"They have much to talk about. Arthur confessed his feelings to her," Merlin explained. "I wanted to give them a chance to talk in private. Also, I think you should be there when I speak to Evi."

"Why?" Gwen asked. Her brow was scrunched up in confusion.

"Because Arthur intends for Evi to be a blacksmith and he wants him to use your father's workshop," Merlin told her quietly. "He didn't think you would mind, but I wanted to make sure you were truly okay with that before I offered it to him."

"He really cares about this girl, doesn't he?" Gwen asked.

"He does," Merlin agreed. Gwen stared at Merlin for several minutes.

"Very well then," Gwen told him, finally breaking the silence. "Let's go speak with Evi. It's about time my father's workshop got some use."

Merlin could see how hard it was for Gwen to let go of her father's workshop. It was the only thing she had to remember her father by. Merlin looked around and pulled Gwen into an ally between two houses. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead. "Are you sure? I know it is all you have of your father," he said quietly.

Gwen closed her eyes. "I am sure," she said. "Not a day goes by where I don't think of my father, where I don't wish he was here. It's time that I accept he is gone. All his workshop is doing is gathering dust. My father would not have wanted that. He was a kind-hearted man and he would have wanted it to get some use."

Merlin hugged her for several more minutes. Gwen clutched tufts of his shirt in her fists as she came to terms with what she was doing.

When Gwen relaxed her grip, Merlin took a step back from her. He brushed the hair out of her face and leaned down to kiss her gently. When he broke the kiss, he looked at her. "Ready?" He asked her.

"Ready," Gwen said.

She took Merlin's hand and they made their way to where Evi worked. Gwen knew it was time to let go and look forward to a brighter future.


	20. Epilogue

**Season 1 Episode 12.**

**Story 12: Hidden**

**Epilogue**

Five years had passed. It was the eve of Merlin and Gwen's fifth wedding anniversary. Their anniversary was being overshadowed by another much more important occurrence: the birth of their second child. Gwen's labor pains started around midday and Merlin immediately sent for Gaius. Merlin had learned with their first child, his handsome four year old son, Thomas, that he did not want midwives anywhere near Gwen nor his child. They had fussed far too much over the infant and had refused to let Merlin or Gwen hold him for days.

And Merlin knew he could trust Gaius.

Merlin could hear faint giggles outside of their room and he couldn't help but smile. Arthur and Eilonwy were taking care of Thomas while Gwen was in labor.

The relationship that had blossomed between them still shocked and confused Merlin. He had never seen Arthur act like such a lovesick fool, nor had he seen Eilonwy so infatuated with someone. They rarely had spent a minute apart when they arrived in Camelot.

Evi had accepted the offer and they had left for Camelot three days after the wedding. Neither of them had uttered a word to their father. They just left. Evi truly was a talented blacksmith and he was sought after by many to make various weapons or decorations for even the most noble of noblemen.

After several weeks of observing how Eilonwy interacted with his people, Arthur asked her to marry him. It was almost sickening watching them together. Merlin had never seen two people so right for each other. They were so similar, yet so different. Merlin had actually seen both of them apologize to one another and admit they were wrong about something. It may have been the strangest thing he had ever witnessed.

Arthur had feared that his people would be displeased with his choice of a bride and was shocked by their overwhelming support. People from all over Camelot celebrated his wedding.

Their marriage had been a fruitful one. Like all couples they had their ups and downs, but they always managed to overcome whatever problems arose.

About two years after they were married, they found out they could not have children. Merlin suspected that it was because of the magic involved in Arthur's birth. There was no other explanation, because when Merlin examined them, he found them perfectly healthy and capable of conceiving children. It was a blow neither of them had expected. It took them months to accept it, but eventually they did. They had different ways of coping with it, namely in watching over other people's children. They found this to be the best solution, because they could work it around their demanding schedules.

In particular, they enjoyed Thomas. He was such a well-behaved child. Thomas definitely took after his mother.

When guards had alerted Arthur that Gwen was in labor, he barely said a word to Merlin as he collected Thomas. He could see that Merlin was too nervous to focus on anything but Gwen.

Eilonwy had joined him a couple of minutes later. For hours they played with Thomas until they heard a piercing scream come from Gwen. It was immediately followed by the wail of a newborn.

Thomas immediately stopped playing with them and started to run towards the door. Eilonwy was faster than him and she scooped him up before he made it more than a few feet.

"Why did mommy scream?" Thomas asked. "Is mommy okay?" There were tears streaming down his little face. It broke Eilonwy's heart to see him so upset.

"Mommy is fine," Eilonwy said gently. "Do you remember how we said there was a baby in mommy's tummy?"

Thomas scrunched up his face. "Yes," he said. "No one would tell me why mommy ate a baby."

Arthur chuckled. "The baby had to stay in her tummy until it was ready to come out," Arthur explained. "Well your little sibling is ready. They just came out. Now we have to wait a little while before we can go in."

"But why would they hurt her?" Thomas asked. Their words had done nothing to appease him. "Why would they make her scream like that?"

"You made her scream like that too," Arthur pointed out.

Thomas looked horrified with himself and a fresh round of sobs racked through his tiny body. He buried his head in Eilonwy's shoulder and she held him close to her. Eilonwy sent Arthur an annoyed look. She loved Arthur with all of her being, but sometimes he wasn't very sensitive.

"Sweetie," she said, trying to cheer Thomas up. "The baby doesn't want to hurt your mommy, they just can't help it. But do you know what daddy is going to do? Daddy is going to make it so mommy doesn't hurt anymore. He'll make her as good as new."

"Promise?" Thomas asked her. He was still crying, but he had calmed down a bit.

"Promise," Eilonwy promised.

Thomas let his head fall back to her shoulder. He was exhausted. Crying really took a lot out of him. "I still want to see mommy," he said tiredly.

"You will sweetie," Eilonwy promised. "Very soon, I'll make sure you get to see mommy."

"Thank you Aunt Lony," Thomas said. His eyes drifted open and closed as he waited to see his mother. Eilonwy smiled at his nickname for her. When he had been learning how to talk, he could not pronounce Eilonwy. He settled for Lony which was easier for a two year old to pronounce.

Eventually Merlin came outside. He looked tired, but happy. Thomas snapped awake when he saw his father. "Daddy," he cried, reaching for his father.

Merlin took him. "What's wrong?" Merlin asked, taking in Thomas's puffy eyes and red face.

"Is mommy okay?" Thomas asked him. "I heard her scream but Aunt Lony wouldn't let me in."

Merlin glanced at Eilonwy apologetically. "Mommy is alright. She's resting now," Merlin told him. "If you promise to be really quiet, I'll take you in to see her. And you can see your little sister."

"I promise," Thomas said. He was practically bouncing in Merlin's arms.

Merlin walked towards the bed where Gwen lay. "Mommy!" Thomas cried, wiggling out of Merlin's hold.

Gwen stirred in her sleep and blinked her eyes. When she saw her son, she patted the empty space on the bed next to her. Merlin couldn't suppress his eye roll. He should have known better than to expect his four year old to honor a promise.

"What's wrong honey," she asked Thomas. She wiped away his tears.

"I heard you scream," Thomas said hysterically.

"That was a happy scream," Gwen explained. "I was so happy to meet your little sister that I couldn't keep myself quiet." Merlin had to bite his lip to keep from laughing. That was genius.

"Can I meet her?" Thomas asked. Now that he was certain his mother was okay he could focus on other things.

Gwen looked at Merlin with her eyebrows raised. She was tired. Very tired. Even with Merlin healing her, childbirth was exhausting.

Merlin extended his arms. Thomas readily climbed into them. Merlin walked over to the tiny cot that Gaius had brought with him. He was currently examining the child. "This is your sister," Merlin told him. "This is Alya."

Thomas looked at the child curiously. "Why is she so wrinkly?" He asked.

Merlin couldn't help but laugh. "She's supposed to look that way," he assured Thomas. "Now let's give mommy and Alya time to rest."

Years passed. Merlin and Gwen didn't have any more children. They had their hands full with Alya. She was Merlin's daughter through and through, right down to the magic. Do you know how much havoc a toddler can wreak during a temper tantrum if she has magic? A lot.

When Alya was six years old, Merlin and Gwen were dining with Morgana, Arthur, and Eilonwy when Eilonwy clutched her stomach in pain. She stood up and rushed out of the dining hall. She returned several minutes later, her face pale and her brow sweaty.

Merlin watched her concerned. "Has this happened a lot?" He asked her. She didn't look frightened by what had happened which only left the possibility that it was a common occurrence.

"For the past several days," Eilonwy admitted.

"I keep telling her she should go to Gaius, but she refuses," Morgana said.

"Why do you refuse?" Merlin asked her.

"Because she believes Gaius will tell her that she is fatally ill and she doesn't want to burden our people with that knowledge," Arthur told him. Merlin really looked at Arthur for the first time. He looked tired and it was clear this was eating away at him. He was worried for Eilonwy.

"Come with me," Merlin ordered Eilonwy.

"But–" Eilonwy started to object.

Merlin glared at her until she stood and joined him. Merlin left the dining room and walked towards the chambers Eilonwy and Arthur shared. He opened the door and waited for Eilonwy to enter before he did so himself.

"Tell me everything," he told her quietly.

Eilonwy started listing everything she had noticed over the past several days. Merlin waited patiently until she finished. "You know what this means," Merlin told her. "Why haven't you told Arthur?"

"You told us that we cannot have children. You said if we could it would have happened long ago. How can I expect Arthur to believe that after eleven years of trying for a child we have finally succeeded? I wouldn't believe it if I didn't know it to be true," Eilonwy said. She sounded terrified and Merlin knew her emotions were justified.

Merlin hated to question her, but he needed to make sure. "I need you to promise me you have been faithful to Arthur," Merlin told her quietly. "It's not that I don't trust you, it's just that you have been trying for eleven years."

"I swear," Eilonwy said. She never took her eyes off of Merlin. She didn't even blink. "I love Arthur far too much to ever betray him like that."

Merlin let out the breath he had been holding. He almost couldn't believe it. Almost. He hadn't been certain that the impossible could be done. "Okay then," he said. "When did you last bleed?"

"Just like that? You believe me?" Eilonwy asked surprised.

"I have no reason not to. I'm sorry I questioned you in the first place, I just needed to make sure. If I back you, Arthur will believe you, but I wasn't going to lie to him," Merlin explained. He couldn't help the happiness that swelled up in him. This meant it worked. He couldn't wait to tell Gwen.

Eilonwy nodded to show Merlin she understood. "How do we tell him?" Eilonwy asked.

A faint smile touched Merlin's lips. "You'll think of something," he told her.

"How did Gwen tell you?" Eilonwy asked.

Merlin closed his eyes remembering when Gwen told him she was pregnant with their first child. He had thought she was dying the way she set him up for the news. "You might want to think of your own way. This is a special thing. Only you can know the right way to tell Arthur," Merlin told her.

"And what if he believes I committed adultery?" Eilonwy asked.

"Tell him you didn't," Merlin told her nonchalantly.

"And if he still doesn't believe me?" Eilonwy asked worriedly.

"Then I'll talk to him," Merlin told her. "But I don't foresee it being a problem. Arthur loves you and I'm sure he'll see the truth."

"I hope you're right Merlin," Eilonwy said slowly. "I hope you're right."

Five days later, Eilonwy told Arthur she was pregnant. To her surprise, Arthur never considered the possibility that she may have committed adultery. "How is this possible?" He asked her.

"I… I'm not sure," Eilonwy answered. "Merlin says that sometimes it takes a long time. He's never heard of it taking such a long time to conceive a child, but he hasn't had much work with women in the early stages of their pregnancy. He's only had to help Gaius deliver a child on a handful of occasions."

"So we just got very lucky?" Arthur asked. He let out a joyous chuckle. "I don't believe this. I'm going to be a father. You're going to be a mother. I never thought I would have this chance."

Eilonwy watched him for any sign that he didn't believe her, but if he did have his doubts he didn't voice them.

After several minutes passed, a strange look came across Arthur's face and Eilonwy feared that this would be the moment where he became suspicious. To her surprise, Arthur practically ran out of the room with a, "I've got to talk to Merlin."

Eilonwy didn't try to stop him. She knew that if he was having his doubts she could trust Merlin to appease him. She was a little wounded that Arthur didn't trust her, but she wasn't sure if that's what he wanted to talk to Merlin about. He could just be nervous about the prospect of having a child.

Unable to stifle her curiosity, Eilonwy followed him. He had eavesdropped on her once before, it was only fair she returned the favor.

Eilonwy was partially surprised when Arthur entered the house Merlin and Gwen lived in without knocking. She didn't even need to listen at the door to hear his first question.

"What did you do?" Arthur asked furiously. Eilonwy hesitated before she walked closer.

"What are you talking about?" Merlin asked obliviously.

"What did you do? How is Eilonwy pregnant?" Arthur asked him.

"Well Arthur, when two people love each other and they–" Merlin started to say.

"I want the truth Merlin," Arthur told him. "Just three months ago I told you I was scared about what I was going to do without an heir. You told me that it may be possible that Eilonwy could not conceive a child without magic. I agreed that using magic was out of the question. I would never sacrifice someone's life so I could have an heir. So I ask you again. What did you do?"

"Arthur, I didn't do anything," Merlin insisted. Eilonwy couldn't even see him and she knew he was lying.

"Merlin," Gwen said quietly. "Tell him."

"Tell me what?" Arthur asked angrily.

"Are you sure? You said you didn't want to tell anyone," Merlin reminded Gwen. He completely ignored Arthur's question. Gwen had been overjoyed when she found out that Eilonwy was pregnant.

"I'm sure," Gwen promised. "He has a right to know what you did."

Eilonwy could hear Merlin let out a long breath. "I went to the Isle of the Blessed and I bargained with the last high priest of the old religion. A man known as Alator," Merlin said reluctantly.

"Whose life did you bargain?" Arthur asked. Eilonwy put her hand on her stomach. She had yearned for a child for years, but now she was not so certain. She had seen how awful Arthur felt about the death of his mother. Eilonwy was sure that hers was not the life that Merlin had bargained, but she hated the thought that the birth of her child would mean the death of another. Knowing Merlin, it was probably him. "I swear, if you bargained your own life… why are you laughing Guinevere?"

"Do you think I would ever let Merlin bargain his own life? I'm sorry, but I'm much too selfish to do that. I would have no idea how to handle Alya when she's having a temper tantrum. Unlike Merlin I cannot make her levitate in the corner when she's being bad," Gwen pointed out.

"Then tell me. How is this possible?" Arthur asked.

"It's not exactly a life we bargained," Merlin said slowly. "More like we bargained fertility for fertility."

"Um… what?" Arthur asked confused. Eilonwy was struggling to understand as well.

"You know that we decided we didn't want any more children," Gwen told Arthur. "Well since Alya was born, I've been drinking a potion so I wouldn't get pregnant. After you spoke to Merlin about your fears, Merlin had an idea that we could exchange my fertility to give you the chance to have children. We ventured to the Isle of the Blessed and Alator told us that he wasn't sure it would work, but he could try. We slipped the water he gave us in your morning wine. I didn't want you to know because we feared it wouldn't work." Gwen blushed and averted her gaze. "Merlin assured me that you wouldn't need to know about it to attempt to conceive a child."

Eilonwy stared at the door in front of her. She was barely aware of pushing the door open and she completely ignored the shocked looks that greeted her arrival.

"Are you saying this won't be our only child?" She asked breathlessly. She couldn't help the hope that had surged in her. She had always wanted a large family and she had been willing to sacrifice that for Arthur. She loved him far too much to do anything else. She needed to know if they could have other children. One child was a blessing. If she could have more, that was a miracle.

"You're older than you once were," Merlin said gently. "But you will be able to have other children. Not many, but yes, it is possible."

Eilonwy couldn't help herself as she lunged forward and embraced Merlin and Gwen. She was crying and she couldn't make herself stop. She would be able to have a family with the man she loved. "How can I ever repay you?" she asked.

She took a step back from them, wiping the tears from her eyes. "There's nothing to repay," Merlin told her sincerely.

"Yes there is," Arthur told him. "You do so much and you seldom ask for recognition."

"That's not why I do this," Merlin pointed out.

"Regardless. It wouldn't be wrong for you to take the credit for your actions," Arthur told him. "I know I don't say this enough, but thank you."

Arthur hesitated before he embraced Merlin. He seldom let his feelings show, but Merlin and Eilonwy had an uncanny ability to make him comfortable with expressing his feelings.

When he pulled back Merlin was looking at him with a faint smile on his face. "Can I get that in writing?" He teased. Arthur rolled his eyes. Merlin immediately became serious. "It's the least I can do. I owe you so much after everything you have done for me and more importantly for Gwen. I don't know where I would be without the help you gave us."

"You really don't see it, do you?" Arthur asked incredulously.

"See what?" Merlin asked confused.

"How much you have done for us," Arthur said. "None of us, myself included would be here if it weren't for you. I don't even know how many times you have saved my life. I've lost count. You saved everyone in Camelot when you killed Morgause. You've saved Morgana and you still help her with her magic. Let's not even get into all of the people that you have helped. Evi, Lancelot, Gia. And now you've given me a chance to have children. It is not you who is indebted to me, but I who is indebted to you. If ever you or Gwen are in need of anything, you need only ask."

Merlin opened and closed his mouth several times, staring at Arthur shocked. "I just did what anyone would have done," he said quietly.

Gwen let out a frustrated sigh. Everyone looked at her surprised. "No," she disagreed. "You've done what no one else was capable of. Ignoring all the miracles you've caused, we need look no further than your character to see what an amazing man you are. You could have become like Morgause or Nimueh, but you refused to allow yourself to manipulate your powers like that. You could have used your powers to kill Arthur and take his throne more times than I care to count. You went years without a good night sleep just so you could make sure I was safe and see me every day. You have earned the love, trust, and respect of a man that once would have killed you for your powers. If that doesn't prove you to be a good man, doesn't prove you to be special than I don't know what does. You didn't do what anyone would have done. You did what only you could do. And I am so, so proud of you. As I know we all are."

Merlin turned slightly and squeezed Gwen's hand. It meant something different coming from Gwen. Gwen was his wife, she was the love of his life. He knew she had been honest in her words. It was just difficult for him to look at it that way. There was a time when he would have given anything for someone to recognize all he had done, there were days when he felt like all the secrets he had to keep were tearing him apart. But now, he was so happy and making other people happy made him even happier.

"Now don't let this go to your head. It's big enough as it is," Arthur warned.

Merlin chuckled. "Look who's talking," Merlin taunted. "If your head gets any bigger your crown won't fit." Merlin dropped his voice to a whisper so only Gwen could hear him. "Luckily for him pride doesn't make his waist get bigger because his belt is running out of extra notches."

Gwen couldn't help the laughter that escaped her. She put her hand over her mouth to try and stifle her giggles.

"I heard that Merlin," Arthur said annoyed. "And I am not getting fat."

"You're right. You're just expanding in the stomach area," Merlin said with an innocent smile.

Arthur clenched his hand into a fist and smiled at Merlin. "You know Merlin. I think it's time you learned how to run," Arthur said.

With that, Merlin darted out the door, trying to escape Arthur's wrath. Arthur was hot on his heels. "You know with a little less padding, you probably could catch me," Merlin called over his shoulder.

That's the last thing Gwen and Eilonwy heard from their husbands. "Should we stop them?" Eilonwy asked. She sounded slightly worried.

Gwen shook her head. "No," she said. "Merlin won't hurt Arthur too badly." They started to laugh. No one would have ever expected a manservant to be more dangerous than a battle-hardened king. But nothing was normal when it came to the two men.

Eilonwy and Gwen went to stand by the door and watched while their husbands chased one another around. Every now and then a piece of rotting vegetable or some cloth that had been long discarded on the ground would be thrown by Merlin or Arthur. Their actions would have normally caught the attention of every commoner in Camelot, but it happened far too often to stir any interest. They exchanged an amused glance. They would never understand the relationship between the king and his manservant. But they supposed that that was one of the mysteries of friendship.

They had a good life. Eilonwy rested her hand on her stomach. She had many happy years ahead of her as they all did. They watched as Arthur eventually caught Merlin in a death grip and rubbed his knuckles over Merlin's head until he gave up. Merlin eventually threw his hands in the air in defeat.

Arthur put his arm around Merlin's shoulder in a gesture of friendship. They walked back to the house where Gwen and Eilonwy were waiting. Arthur walked towards Eilonwy and captured her in a hug. For a moment, Merlin just watched. He would never admit it out loud, but he was proud of the man Arthur had become. Feelings of happiness surged up in Merlin. He was truly proud of him.

**I try to write one-shots... I really do. But quite often my brain takes a turn and they stop becoming one-shots and become very long stories. I hope this was okay despite the twists and turns my brain took to get it here :) Let me know what you think! I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it :)**


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